I May Never Find The Right One. Here's Why.

I'm screwed because I may never find her. But I can look on the bright side:
I'm kind but I'm not a pushover: I like to help people and am polite but I know where my boundaries are and I will enforce them if I must. I keep the old art of being a gentleman alive.
I'm romantic and thoughtful but I know when an idea for affection can go too far.
I'm a professional peacebuilder: sensing and discovering when something is wrong is my specialty, and am very creative in finding ways to address wrongs. And I'm completely open to admitting if its my fault.
I'm athletic and decently good looking. I dance ballroom (mostly blues, salsa, and east-coast swing) and I'm very good lead partner. 
I'm hardworking and very knowledgeable about many things: practical like electricity and plumbing, and academic knowledge for cocktail parties. I can entertain guests for hours. I am just as comfortable in a dive-bar as I am in a 3 star restaurant.
So I can say for myself I would be a decent catch. No harm in knowing what you are.

My problem:
I'm going to be an ordained minister in a Christian church. Who in the name of God and all things holy is going to want to marry a preacher?
I can tell you right now, the women I have met who do want that are not my kind of women... at all. I'm not a goodie-2-shoes. I drink, smoke, swear and unwilling to change that. There's nothing wrong with it because these are not problems of addiction or abuse. They're superficial in comparison to real problems of hatred, racism, chronic need of things, greed and narcissism.
I have no idea what the CHURCH is going to do with me, let alone what kind of woman would consider spending the rest of her life not just dealing with me and my eccentricities, but how the church will deal with me, and essentially both of us. I'm exceptionally liberal in my view of God, my faith and Christianity. Which means I'm going to cause alot of trouble. Not to mention we would be having preacher's kids. . . FML
Like most guys, I love to see a woman in short skirt, fishnets, and knee-high boots... well, knee high socks too but with a different outfit... but I am a feminist and want an equal and monogamous relationship with my future spouse. I want my spouse to be the kind of woman who would want to wear that kind of dress for herself and as a plus, to turn me on.
Not to mention, by most societal standards especially in the circles of Christianity, I'm something of a sexual deviant and will get screwed if news of that gets outside of my bedroom.
How in the name of Jesus, Mary, Joseph and his damned technicolor dreamcoat am I going to find a woman like that?
I would love for you to tell me that it's not impossible.
Arimatheus Arimatheus
26-30, M
1 Response May 6, 2012

Thanks for being so honest. I think you should try dating sites and be as honest there as you have been here. Perhaps try sites that are attuned to your "deviance" and then introduce your beliefs, rather than the other way around! I feel somewhat like you do. I am a liberal Christian, too and would like to find someone who is the same. But where I live now, the Christian community is conservative and/or evangelical. I'm working on a contract, so no possibility of just leaving anytime soon... I wish you all the best and think that you will find exactly what you need. Blessings to you!