This Person Changed Me.

. Two years before my freshman year, i met a girl .She's smart, nice,and has sparkling chinky eyes.Almost every guy in our school would have a crush on her. It wasn't love at first sight when i met her while building up a sand castle. We were at the same class and became close friends easily.Then i suddenly realize i was staring at her every moment in the class. .Everything that she is. Everything she does. It was magical. I always think of her every day.And i couldn't stop it. She has this unexplainable charisma. Every moment we spent together my heart beats as if it would burst out of my chest. The most memorable phrase she said to me was"****** i need you.I always act awkward and i don't know why. Every time she focuses on other things then suddenly talks to me, i would say "now your talking to me? Damn then i would back out until she follows me and asks"whats wrong?" Nothing i'm just kidding" then we would smile at each other. All i really wanted was her attention and until she realizes that all her suitors doesn't suit her and only i can give her the full attention she needs .I'm good enough for her and i would do anything just for her, just to prove that i love her so much though i have never told it to her even once .I would just express it to her and hoping she would realize that i was worth more than a friend anyway.I even remembered our first mall shopping together first studio picture in valentines day. Then i bought her the biggest teddy bear she saw while in the mall together . I heard a voice in my head saying "yes. this is it. " while imagining that shes mine "hey i want to spend the rest of my life with you" would that be okay?" "If not, i would not know what to do. You already had everything of me. I'm yours , so please,"" I was only waiting for the right time to tell her how i really feel not just as a friend. She was the first thing i would think of every time i wake up in the morning.She was the reason why i wake up while smile in my face. First image that flashes in my mind when i hear any love song.For Me she was the only and last girl in my heart and i would never find any other. I love her not physically but with all commitments. She was the only beauty that i could see. The person that gave me so much happiness is sadly the person who gave me so much pain in my heart. I only thought she was the one. Until she told me that she was going to transfer to another university after graduation. I told her "please. No. Don't go, Just stay here. (with me)" But she left. I felt like our friendship just flew like a dust in the wind.My heart was killing me so much. I dont even know what to do if i didnt get a chance to see her even after a few days but  this distance between us all i think that little by little our friendship and my love would just fade away. I cried in my room like a loser after the last day i was with her.  "why did you have to go? why would you just leave me like this. I loved you. I cant let go, please make the pain stop" while i was holding her picture in my hand my tears kept falling. But now shes permanently gone. there nothing i could do. 3

chewandswallow chewandswallow
1 Response Dec 1, 2012

I know this is hard but I think unless you FINALLY tell her she will not know that your feeling this way. Imagine if you did things would be different she wouldnt have left. Try to tell her its never too late and its not worth it being sad over someone you love but doesnt know you love them, you know what I mean?