Just Keep Waiting!!!!

Okay so my boyfriend and I have been dating almost 5 years. Our five years will be this November. I have been wanting to get engaged for a few months now but it has not happen. We have talked about it and he doesn't say no but he doesn't exactly say yes either. Last year for new years he gave me a promise ring with no real big promise. I just feel like after this long either you do or don't want to be with me. We have dicussed that we want a long engagement but you can't have a long engagement without being engaged. it seems like here these past few weeks its been driving me crazy. I think about it several times a day. I even found a ring that I absolutely love. I showed him the ring and all he said was "yeah thats nice".  I'm hoping it will happen in November but i don't know. I bring it up every now and then but I don't get much of a response. What can I do to keep from thinking about it so much??
brit0880 brit0880
18-21, F
2 Responses Aug 12, 2010

You definitely aren't alone, since this was a year ago I hope you are since happily engaged! But if your not, well maybe its time to make a decision. Are you willing to wait for him to propose or is it time to look for someone else who is ready for marriage? If that is the case tell him that you will leave if he hasn't proposed within (set arbitrary date), and if he doesn't, leave him. Its not a threat or an ultimatum. Its just a decision you need to make for yourself. This suggestion may not be right for you, but it depends what is most important to you. This relationship, or finding another equally good or better relationship with a man who is ready to commit. Men don't propose until they are ready. Its like a light switch, one day they aren't ready and the next day they are. They may have been with you 20 years, or 3 months, every guy is different but it often depends on if they have a good job, how old they are, and how well established they are.

I feel EXACTLY the same way you do. Im in the same exact position. Our 5 year dating anniversary is this weekend. We're totally in love and know we want to marry each other in the future. We want to have a long engagement due to our age and financial position at the moment. Yet he has not proposed marriage to me. I feel like if we have been in such an amazing, loving, respectful relationship for this long that the official engagement should be there. I want the world to know that he is my fiance and we do plan on marrying in the future. I have shown my boyfriend rings as well, and he says that they are pretty but then says "that's an engagement ring..." He can afford the ring, so that is not the problem. Im unsure what to do as well, because I really want to be engaged to him and I keep on waiting for him to pop the question... Sorry I can't help. But just know YOU ARE NOT ALONE.