Waiting GameI am in a military/long distance relationship so, of course, the idea of marriage is absolutely wonderful to me. It would be the end of this lonely struggle. I know that this time apart is considered personal growth since we’re both still pretty young. He’s getting life experience from joining the Navy and traveling, and I am currently working and going to school so I can land my dream job. The distance is a necessary obstacle, it can’t be helped. But I can’t help feeling like I am in the waiting stage of life. I find myself wishing time away. It’s not that I hate the present; it’s just that I know the future could (will) be so much better.
I want to get married so that we can finally live under the same roof, because as of now we can only get short glimpses of each other throughout the year. When we lived near each other all I could think of was what the wedding would be like. How many people would I invite? Where would it be? What kind of dress should I get? I still think about all these things but they are not as important now. My main focus is living situation. I want us to be able to decorate the house together, drive each other to work, and cook meals for each other. I just want consistency…
I am determined to do this right though, so I definitely will not be rushing into this. For one, I have decided not to give in to the military’s pressure; I absolutely do not want to be coerced into having courthouse wedding no matter how long the deployment. This is just something I do not want to give up. Second, I must finish school before I can move in with him because I have to be able to sustain myself while he is gone. Finally, I have to save up money so that we can have an easy transition into this new lifestyle.
I know we won’t be getting married for quite a while but I wouldn’t mind a long engagement. *sigh*