I Want A Baby Soo Bad

Hey. I have been wanting a baby since I was 8 uears old. Odd? Maybe. I had dreams ans desires that starting eating me alive. Worste part? I am a male. Yet I desired to give birth. To be a mother. When I turned 13 I started my own daycare service. For the last 15 years i have gotten up 5 tones a night for countless families to change countless diapers. Twins and more. Have potty trained god knows how many and have bottled, bathed and loved beyond measure. as the children have grown over the years and not needed a caretaker, I just got new families to fill the voice. Know i am 28 and people are afraid of males so nobody hires me despite all my references. So know my childhood dreams of having a baby have returned. Returned with a vengence. I still wake up in the night about a million times to feed what baby is not their. I still watch cartoons meant for 5 years olds. Can't help it. I am drawn to raising a family. But i am not attracted to having a mate, so I can't just make a baby. I could adopt but how would I take care of the child if i have to work too? Everywhere I go I see people with kids and babies and I am flooded with memories of making dinner and helping with homework and prepering the bath. I know how you feel. It's almost like some people are meant to be mothers. When I used to wake up at nights to feed or diaper, run out from a shower at the sound of something, teach how to walk and ride a bike or just get screamed at by an upset child, I found every moment to be amazingly wonderful to be helping a small human being grow and learn.



Their is no answer to people like us. Other then keep moving forward and try ones best to set into motion the things needed to have a family, not Mich else can be done. They say destractions like volunteerong work. When i am doing something, I fins myself humming a lullabye or thinking of a good activiy for a child i nolonger have. Just don't give up. You have in you the seeds of life. Unlike sterral and none female me, you just need to find a man willing to having a baby.