EP WARS ... Carnage as EP moves everything slightly to the left

HOSPITALS were struggling to cope last night as rival EP gangs fought running battles across a dozen towns and cities.

A hellish symphony of fire and blood

Violence erupted as EP ignored the warnings of more than one million protesters and moved everything very slightly to the left.

Whatnot, commander of the Lyme Regis brigade of Keep the Old EP, said: “I was waiting for my page to load, looking directly at the centre of the screen, when suddenly my life became a storm-tossed fishing boat in a sea of confusion.

Wilmaaaa said “Everything that mattered to me was now three centimetres to the left of where it normally is. And a little bit wider. And the blue-grey panel on the right was a bit wider too.”

Wimper232 added: “Those who support the new design are nerds.”

Dimwit, from Dorchester, who makes weapons for We Like the New EPlook , said: “That blue-grey panel was always far too narrow. Don’t you think?”

The violence peaked at around 5pm when the New York faction of What About Moving Everything Slightly to the Right ? ... burned down the local church and pushed a van full of policemen into a quarry.

EP founder AmenRa has given the protesters until noon to surrender before he starts machine gunning them from a helicopter.

46-50, M
6 Responses Dec 4, 2012

This is hilarious. Thanks for sharing.

It's all RIGHT :))

Lol, well done! This made me laugh. :)


Good to see Wilmaaaa back, lol.

hehehe :)

i LOVE this story. kudos to the author. you made my day a little brighter :)

You're welcome :)

**Enters room with fire extinguisher in hand**

I always enjoy your stories, whether they're written to tell us what we're doing right or what we're doing wrong, because in the end it helps us build a better EP together.

We're not going to make change for the sake of change alone and will only do so if it's going to significantly help improve EP and make it easier to share and connect with other, in one way or another.

Now we're human and we can make mistakes that why we ask members to help us beta test new features and provide feedback while the feature is still in it's early development.

To opt into one of many beta test available now (we just added one that allows you to post anonymous stories) visit your account settings.

I'm drenched ... thank you for a lovely reply :)

Have you tried the psychics yet?

sounds like a good name for a story :)