This Is Getting Beyond a Joke. Angry!

I have already send you a member flag, but I want to share this here as well as I read about a similar complaint only yesterday.

This morning I commented on the following anonymous confession:

 

Hi I'm 13 years old and i ********** at least 1-4 times a week and im not sure if this is normal at my age, can i have some tips.

 

I just came home to find the poster had PMed me say it was theirs and asking for advice.

I went onto their profile to find it came with a warning.

You have disabled adult filtering, and may be exposed to mature content.

Yes, I was apparently being warned that I may be exposed to adult content on the profile of A THIRTEEN YEAR OLD.  

Admittedly this person had lied about their age but I really think their needs to be more stricked checks/rules in place to prevent this kind of thing from happening. 

This is the second time I have had to flag something like this, the first time being when I found that a member with the username FreeSexNow was also just thirteen. Again, via the confessions page.

It is things like this that are causing me to begin to wonder whether EP is a safe place to be for children OR adults. 

Some options could be:

  • Displaying a warning about the risks of lying about your age on the sign up screen.
  • Warning that anyone discovered lying about being over 18 will face an instant ban.
  • Removing the 13-15 years age bracket. 
  • Adult profiles should be blocked to minors as minors are blocked to ours.
  • Zero private conversation should be permitted between adults and minors. 

 

deleted deleted
26-30
19 Responses Mar 23, 2009

I'm a 15 year old with severe depression and this site is very useful to me. I had to lie about my age when joining websites until I turned 13, and I don't want to do that again. Although I was tempted to lie so that I could join adult groups (many of which are relevant to me), I didn't. I have always loved to communicate with adults, as it's hard for me to relate with my age group. However, many adults have avoided me like I'm something to be afraid of or be unable to look past my age.

"perhaps you are not aware of sexual predators on the internet?"<br />
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Sorry, Sleepless, but you're quite wrong. What happens on the Internet is *virtual*. Only what happens in real life, outside the Internet, is *real*.<br />
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Some sexual predators *use* the Internet to meet people in real life. They present a real-world hazard that is quite easily avoided in most cases. Educate your children as to how. The best thing you can ever do is to help them understand the boundary between "real" world and "virtual" world, and what manner of personally identifying information should not cross that boundary.<br />
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However, it sounds as if you are having a hard time making that distinction yourself. How sad for you.<br />
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Please, apply some logic to your argument. Who is such a predator more likely to prey upon? Someone who is labelled as a child? Or one who is not labelled at all?

I agree, there needs to be something done to make EP safe for all. Im just concerned that if we are actually talking to someone who is not an adult, and we give advice, etc, is it possible that we can get into any kind of trouble? Some sort of filtering system is needed.

I have two friends on here that are under 18<br />
I keep my conversations with them motherly and supportive <br />
I support safety check for age

I'm appalled by the sheer ignorance of this post and the surrounding comments. Do you not remember being children yourselves? Did you like having to grope blindly in the dark, seeking information about your own sexuality? About your own place in a mature world as a potential adult?<br />
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Please, don't insult the rest of us by saying you learned by osmosis. Or that you only came by answers after the age of 18. Or that you came by good answers at all, from your limited sources of underage information.<br />
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No wonder the world is such a mess. When children are blocked from certain "taboo" nuggets of information, how are they ever to achieve any kind of hypothetical maturity?<br />
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If you want your children to be safe, then don't block them. Instead, take them on a guided tour. Point out the bad parts. Explain why.<br />
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The safe anonymity of the Internet can be quite empowering to a child. It's a place where questions like the one this child raised can be done so without being utterly mortified -- and get answers from people who can provide real answers. I can only wish I had this kind of a resource, growing up.

And I want to flirt with the ball, knowing that no thirteen year old can best me :)

Block them, its all you can do, its not EP's fault, kids are doing this ALL OVER the web, sure, cut out the age bracket and they'll just claim to be 18, or 21...

I understand what you have said I would respond to someone who is 18 or more I warn anyone that is 13<br />
that there are dangerous people out there and dont <br />
take talk to them because I feel they need to be a kid<br />
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13 I worry that they could get in big problems

I'm not agains this because I know there are many people who abuse confession etc... but personally I would not be happy if this "Warning that anyone discovered lying about being over 18 will face an instant ban" really happen. Because I'm under 18, although I set my age range 18-21 because of one simple reason. I want to have friends among adults.. I've never get well with teenager of my age.. I was grown among adults and I do have rpoblems talking to younger. Most of my real friends are adults. And I want to get a change to "nice EP adults" to recognize myself without blocking my profile. But yes, I agree with what you said.

I do think that minors have no place here. This is an adult site, emotion wise.<br />
Not all of us are able to handle what's going on here, much less those who are likely yet to have a strong support system or a strong sense of their self worth.<br />
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What I'm also afraid of is the possibilities of child predators posing as minor themselves in order to open communication with other minors.<br />
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I agree with the points you made Sleepless, although one thing that we all still need to think about is how to make sure there is no lying about age.

The issue is that most of the ways to prove your age go against the whole anonymous nature of the site. So how could anyone prove their age without giving away who they are? Because I think that's what it comes down to, there should be a way to prove the ages of people who join.

I hope they can find a way to fix this. It's too bad the parents aren't there to police this themselves. Having raised 5 kids, I can tell you we knew where they were going online at all times. What's wrong with people today? Geez........

Agreed - I never - EVER add anyone under the age of 18 into my circle. One of the people said they got in because they lied of their age - I blocked them. Now I try not to add anyone under 21. I think they should take a look at the 99+ age group too. I've seen some postings and could swear that this are kids .....

I will comment too to support these concerns. I also know that there isn't really any way to control does the person lies about their age or not. So, i guess there is not much to do about it. To change ep to only invite based joining wouldnt be a good idea too...

I agree that the minor usage is disturbing but I'm not sure it can be stopped. Anyone can lie and say they are older or younger for that manor. I doubt the contents of the confessionals whenever I see posting like the one described or the I inserted a fish etc... <br />
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I'm not sure I agree with outright banning of people though, I believe someone mentioned Knucklez who is a themed persona and I can't speak about Navybrat as I do not know "her". There are persona's on here who desite age are questionable to say the least<br />
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I do my best to refrain from commenting on those younger members but to police the actions of a minor who got on here and made an account well I can't be the EP guardian

Exactly, there was a young man that was talking to me a while back that I flagged. He led me to believe that he was a police officer and that he was 35. That was what his profile said. I suspected something was up with him, either that he was lying on his age, or that he was not very mature/bright for his age. After I got onto him about some things he said to me he admitted to me that he was 15 years old. I was relieved somewhat, but also quite ashamed of myself because I sent him roll after roll after roll of toilet paper to let him know I thought he was full of sh*t. I wouldn't have done that had I known he was a kid. <br />
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How do you lie about your age in that manner and then join adult groups? Before I changed my adult filter I couldn't see those until I clicked a button accepting it?

I wouldnt wish the job of social website moderator on my worst enemy. It is a thankless no-win situation. Anyone can represent themselves anyway they want to at a social website (just because someone says they are 13 dont make it so) and there is very little a moderator can do except warn about sharing personal information to those we dont know. Kids are going to be exposed to things on the internet that parents are not comfortable with. There are some excellent guides out there on how to discuss sensitive internet issues with your children. The key is open and honest parent-child communication and education....not fear.

For real. Thanks for policing and reporting. This site is what we make it.<br />
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~ thumbs up ~

My son is 13 and it terrifies me he may make it onto this site.. OMG!<br />
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and he is interested. loves to look over my shoulder at all the pretty icons... laughing at all the radiculous experience groups...<br />
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I try to not be on when he is here, but I'm afraid the seed may be planted.<br />
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I have not seen any activity in his 'cookie' files yet.<br />
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Lets all pull together to keep this site safe for the kids. PLEASE!!<br />
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There are so many other places to pan the sexual wares... but NOT ON MY EP. PLEASE.