Too Much Pain

There's many reasons I can think of, but thee one I'm hurting from most is pain in my heart. Within two years I've lost my husband's family that I cherished dearly for the reason, I was raised without brothers/sister/aunts/uncles/grandma.. etc. After I felt abanded from them.. things just went downhill. We lost our house due to foreclosure, my marriage was empty, I became very depressed, tried suicide twice, living with guilt and humilation,  my mother is dying and I can't see her, marriage is now over, heading for divorce, can't get a grip on life anymore. When it all comes down to it.. i want to kill myself because I want to!! It's my body, my right, my decision to make. 
Calif39 Calif39
36-40, F
5 Responses May 6, 2012

hello cali, sounds like you need a savior, god sent him to you, Jesus loves and rescues you from all troubles. call upon him he is rich in mercy and love, he never rejects anyone who comes to him. but gives life.

do not kill yourself no matter what ur going through u r to precious to lose and u will get through u have to give yourself some time to heal and not give up

Life has a funny way of turning things around , just the way it turned your wonderful life into q living hell. But My dear the world is still spinning , it never stays at one point too long. Life is a roller coaster, your just at the point where it seems like its going downhill, but whats really happening is that its only preparing to go up again.

I lost my life to my family my house, car, i know how you feel i wish i was dead i have tried but keep living i am tired of being without my family and my kids all that i love gone i cant cope anymore i think its time to end my pain and end my unhappiness and commit suicide.

Yes but I know atleast one person that will miss you very much ! Me :(......