I Refuse To Make A 50 Shades Of Grey Joke

1. My name is not really Barvo Delancy. It's a pseudonym.
2. My name is Dave. I'll offer the rest if you're very nice and I know you for a while.
3. I cook very well.
4. I play trombone passably well.
5. I play guitar decently.
6. I play keyboard terribly.
7. I type on keyboards extremely well. 150 wpm baby, woo!
8. I'm married.
10. I'm nutso about my wife. She's awesome and hilarious.
11. I own two dogs.
12. I own two cats.
13. I like my cats, but I love my dogs.
14. Although I talk a big game, I do not have a degree. I was a lazy young man.
15. I work at a University in project management.
16. I'm fiercely pro-union and sit on my union executive.
17. I'm an anarchist. But I compromise as a social democrat more than I'd like to admit.
18. The only thing I hate more than the Democrats are the Republicans.
19. I love craft beer.
20. I've brewed my own beer a few times.
21. I'm messy.
22. I'm still lazy.
23. I live in what I call northern Canada. If you look at a map it looks pretty southern though.
24. I love bragging about how cold it gets here. -40 in the winters. Well not so much any more.
25. I think global warming is observable fact.
26. I hate conspiracy theorists.
27. I'm a feminist.
28. I kind of hate the jargon of feminist theory though.
29. I hate jargon of all kinds. Business language is bad language.
30. I play buzzwork bingo at work. If I'm feeling snarky I just shout 'bingo' in meetings if someone says something stupid like 'paradigm' or uses 'win' as a noun.
31. I adore my family.
32. My mother is a longtime politician, union lady, teacher and beloved by everyone who knows her well.
33. My father is a genius in his own right with an amazing body of work in his field.
34. He is also a compulsive alcoholic.
35. My sister got all the good genes. She's as smart as I am, but she's also gorgeous and classy.
36. I don't have an extended family, all my cousins are at least one removed and I don't know them. My parents are only children.
37. That's a lie, my dad had a brother who died when he was 21. Way before I was born.
38. My favorite musician is Tom Waits.
39. My other favorite musicians change. I love the Carolina Chocolate Drops, Major Parkinson and the Kaizers Orchestra right now.
40. I don't read as much as people think I do, and its often not the kind of literature I should be reading.
41. I keep in contact with, and am still close friends with several of the people I knew in high school.
42. I have a tiny house in a village of 200 people.
43. I'm in the middle of the Canadian boreal forest. It is vast. VAST.
44. My favorite TV show is Doctor Who.
45. I'm also a big fan of the Wire, the Simpsons in the early to mid 90s, and a few others. Watching a lot of 30 Rock right now.
46. I am not a patriot. Canada is a fine country, but I am deeply ashamed of it.
47. I'm a huge supporter of the Idle No More aboriginal protest movement.
48. Honestly, I'm a fan of most protest movements. Well, except the Tea Party. **** them.
49. I was a hopeless nerd and bullied severely in high school. I'm past that now.
50. I'm genuinely happy.
BarvoDelancy BarvoDelancy
36-40, M
2 Responses Jan 18, 2013

You're an amazing person. :D

Aww, thanks. Back atcha.

Loved this, it got me to write my own... 50 is a lot though! It took me a bit to come up with that many.