Patience Can Be So Hard to Learn

This could be a really long story. But I am tired of re-playing it over and over in my mind and in my heart. I am tired of people asking, people who mean well. Well, most of them. The rest are just nosey, or have a morbid sense of curiousity.

It is kind of like the media feeding off peoples broken lives....

A 21 year relationship, 15 years of marriage, building a home, a family, a love that I believed would last forever. God had blessed us so often in so many ways. What has happened Lord? What can ever come out of this? Lies, 14 months of lies and sneaking around, deceit, pain, saying one thing, always doing another. How did we get here? God, what is your plan? Some days I see it, some days I see nothing but a lonely, aching life ahead of me. A woman who has a husband of her own. One who now has my husband chasing after her?

I hurt Lord. You know that. Please make it stop. Today hurts because of yesterday. I keep trying to do the right things, and it just gets worse. I stayed away. I broke the connection. The soul ties are gone, but in my heart, I still believe that YOU are the God that can do ANYTHING!

I believe in you Lord. Maybe it is me I don't believe in anymore.



Angelgirl01 Angelgirl01
1 Response Feb 19, 2009

Because of you keeping your faith in the Lord, He is going to continue to bless you! He knows your pain, and He will help you through it. I can tell you know that, but it never hurts to be reminded. One thing you have GOT to do is believe in yourself. If you don't, then your ex will pretty much have won the emotions battle, which is not what you want. He treated you like crap, and although God is going to be there for you, you need to also be there for yourself. It's not going to be an easy road getting over something like this, of course, but you can. I have faith in you, and so does God. "You can do anything through Christ who strengthens you." Always keep that verse running through your mind when you're having a hard time. God bless you!