I Want to Know Ten Things About You
1. I have a twin sister , & we never get along. She didn't even call me for our 26th b-day, but she talked to everyone else.
2. Music sounds remind me of colors, & unusual thoughts go on in my mind while listening. I have to meditate, & I can't be interrupted.
3. I suffer OCD, anxiety, Tourette's, & depression, & I have traits of ADHD & Asperger's.
4. I had 2 strokes @ age 5, nose surgery twice-ages 10 & 11, eye surgery @ age 5, & we stayed in & out the Dr.'s & hospitals.
5. I come from a big family who doesn't care about me. Mom tried to slam me & my twin sister in a drawer as newborns, & that's how we ended up in foster care. Stayed with SAME abusive foster family until AFTER 18. Yeah, I said it! They stole the UNDESERVED reward of being foster parents of the year. They tried to murder me on NUMEROUS occasions, & since they were buddy-buddy with the cops, the cops, social workers, psychiatrists, & others ENCOURAGED the abuse & didn't believe anything I said!
6. I fear my future because of my past, & people keep giving me mixed messages about "life". They tell me not to dwell on or worry about the past, but they use it against me & throw it in my face & expect me to take emotional spankings I don't deserve.
7. I had a very unmemorable childhood, & I STAYED punished! Especially for reasons I didn't know. Also, I shouldn't have had to be considered a "bad" child if I have a neurological & mental disability. Foster mom punished me from high school Sr. prom over a minor Tourette's outburst. She KNOWS I have TS. Punished from EVERYTHING! That's why, @ age 26, people think I'm dumb because I've been overly sheltered all my life, & the foster mom had everyone else in her family taking care of & babysitting us frequently. Most folks say I ask questions others my age already know. That's true because I don't have much life experience. @ age 26, I still feel like my life is PUNISHED because people always try to make my life decisions FOR me, & they're not even bad decisions! Even if it's a matter of grocery shopping & choosing what brand of water to buy. Same price but different taste & type. I rather Ozarka than Evian. Tastes better.
8. I'm lucky to have 2 personal friends/mentors who are more therapeutic & helpful than doctors, social workers, case managers, counselors, pastors, etc. Yes, I used to have imaginary friends from ages 6 til 13. I was an outcast of the school. These 2 friends are just as real as me & you, but I don't introduce them to my family because they run away every friend or boyfriend I get. So, what did I say on point 6 about people using my past against me?
2006-2007 was 1st long-term boyfriend. Tell me how, soon as he met my family by phone, he started changing his ways on me, & it was revealed that he cheated. Shattered heart. Well, these 2 "friends" I have, never met my family & never will. I'll keep it that way, OK? 6 1/2 mos., & I thought this guy was faithful. These 2 friends (female) told em that they really want to see me improve my life & grow as a more improved person & move wherever I move. I said I want to travel. They said they want to see me finally happy & get what I want.
9. I have my BA degree in Spanish, even though 2.3 GPA overall, but 2.8 in my major. I want to become a translator & maybe interpreter. Unsure about interpreting because of my Tourette's. I graduated high school with 3.6 GPA. Top 10% of my class Honors. I used to be in special ed, but I was mainstreamed & progressed very well. With college, everything went downhill with my grades because I had just turned 18, foster family stole my $$, biological family (including twin) threatened me out of $$ I didn't have, or else they'd make dangerous, life-threatening lies on me. No one wanted to see me make it through college, but I DID! My family issues affected my mental health, & they both contributed to my poor grades.
10. I suffered Hurricane Katrina, & I'm still trying to recuperate, mentally & financially. I'm in HIGH debt! I don't want to file for bankruptcy or any of that. I'll pay back every penny I owe, & I was told I have to be responsible for the $$ my family threatened me out of. I dream that once all this debt is paid off, I can be happy. I want to learn a lot in life. I want more adventure & experience. I want to get married & have 3 kids, 2 dogs, 5 cats, & 5 exotic fish. Maybe 12 fish, since 12 is my favorite #. I want my house custom-built. I can't draw at all, but I can mentally envision how I want my house to be. My dream car is an Audi that's purple. Doesn't matter really what model, as long as it's freshly new & up-to-date & a manual transmission. My favorite plum purple with dark yellow AND purple inside. Color of the yellow traffic light. Like that golden orangy-yellow color. Hmmm...LA Lakers & LSU colors. ![]()
***Here's a bonus. I LOVE bonuses, you guys.
Become a writer, write a multi-volume autobiography & publish it in other languages. Learn more languages, write fiction & translate them myself, become physically fit & happy. Improve my swimming skills, become a certified lifeguard & scuba diver, learn to make music & become @ least an instrumentalist. I don't have to sing or rap. I was told to not let anyone deter me from my dreams. if I have to disown my family, I'll DO it!
I see why we were put in foster care, but unfortunately, the foster family was so abusive that my biological family may as well should've kept us. Biological & foster family have been grudging against each other for YEARS, but it's amazing how 1 family is a mirror of the other, with thoughts, opinions about me, morality, etc.
END OF STORY OF 10 THINGS ABOUT OTAD12.