I Wish I Knew

Like many others, I had feminine feelings beginning around age 5.

My mom and a friend were giving each other home perms and I insisted on their putting curlers in my hair too. I so loved the feeling even then and it has never, ever left me. Wearing curlers made me feel like a little girl, and I have been fascinated with perms and curls ever since. 

I must have been somewhat obvious given one experience. I remember being with my parents, without my brother being present, at age 5 or 6, and being asked whether I wanted to be a boy or a girl. What else does a little boy say in response? I was actually offered the choice- not sure what they would have done if I had said girl. Perhaps a far more interesting childhood, although ultimately saying boy meant that it was less traumatic in many ways.

What influenced me?  I am convinced that's how I came wired.
Kim1girl Kim1girl
61-65, T
1 Response Dec 8, 2012

Good answer Kim ... yes most if not all of us T-people came prewired. But no doubt your life would have been different if you'd answered "girl" to your parents question.

Without a doubt it would have been different. A good friend who is much younger than I am and I have been discussing this very topic. She didn't get the choice, as her mom decided to raise her as a girl. She posed that very question to me- how would my life had turned out if I had been raised in her heels. I only hope it would have worked out for me as well as it has for her, in no small part resulting from the all the grace and kindness my young friend demonstrates every day in her acceptance and enjoyment of her femininity, even if living as a girl was not by her choice initially.

That is fascinating about your younger friend. Maybe her mom saw the feminine within and that is why she raised her as a girl. How old was she when her mom made this decision and started this?
Now if you had been raised in her heels, well the two of you would probably been the same. The younger we are when we start living as ourselves the easier it is. That way we don't have to now learn what we should have as young girls or on the other side unlearn some things too.

I wholeheartedly agree. Being raised as a girl and nurtured to act as a girl, I am confident I would have come to love living as a girl and my femininity, especially with my initial feminine leanings. That would have hopefully played out positively.

Thanks Kim and I fully agree. Those of us who were blessed with discovering who we were, girls, and then like you and I with friends whose mom saw their fem side or like my mom who saw it within me, rearing me more as a daughter, it played out as positive. But hey, we are delt the cards we are and it seems to me that you've come through it with flying colours! At least now you know whom you are and are enjoying the femminine within. Don't you aqrree?

Yes, I am enjoying my inner femininity, and that makes me a better husband and father. I wouldn't change anything.

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