When I was younger I never dreamed of a future. I didn't want children and the mental illness was so in the forefront that all I wished for was death. I never planned on living past the age of 18... even then I knew it controlled my life.

And I certainly didn't want to grow up like my parents... father who hit, yelled and drank all the time and then the divorce and step monster. Who would dream of anything like that? I'm still not sure of much, trying and it's a daily struggle but keeping too busy to think about the bad, well most of the time.

mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
36-40, F
1 Response Mar 15, 2009

I wanted and still want to live on a farm with a good husband and lots of children I swear I was bord in wrong decade.