Falling For a Married Man

The worst *recent* mistake was falling for a married man who fed me a bunch of lies. And not just falling for him but allowing him to financially support me and moving into a house that he paid for (I couldn't work at the time due to depression and other things). Once he had me where he wanted me and I was unable to leave, everything changed. Suddenly his wife was "back", he stopped staying over 3-4 nights a week, and told me things were moving too fast. HE was the one that made things go so fast. 

There's more to the story, some of which I cannot bring myself to talk about. I was naive and he promised me everything that was missing in my life. A marriage, a house, a bright future, to work for one of his companies and get trained up in New York. He'd even gone so far as having joint bank accounts, joint tenancy agreement on the house, he gave me plenty of money. Was I a fool or what. I'm not young and naive, well naive I was, I was 39 at the time. It was gutwrenchingly awful when he decided, after a year, that he would simply move on. He stopped paying the rent, I had a job by that time but it was not enough to support myself properly. I was forced to move house due to him just disappearing on me for several weeks. I was forced to take the matter into my own hands. He never had any intention to leave his wife, I was just his mistress. It was a huge mistake. He bought me a lot of stuff, but material things don't make up for what he did to me.

I should never have allowed myself to become dependent on him.

IndigoPeachblossom IndigoPeachblossom
36-40, F
2 Responses Mar 16, 2009

Yup, married men hardly ever work out. They either string you a long forever or dump you at the worst time. They seldom marry you, and if they do -- is that the kind of person you want? You can't ever really trsut them.<br />
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You learned some hard lessons, b/c he took advatage of you when you were very vulnerable, and he knew he could manipulate you for his own ends. If you hadn't needed what he offered, do you think he would have been interested? It was control and selfishness that was motivating him.<br />
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At least you have a job, and you got some good loot out of it. (I never got any good loot. LOL) Maybe you can hock or sell some that if you need the cash. That's a better use than just considering it as a thoughtless gift.

Well Im sorry you went through this. However it seems you learned your lessons fooling around with married men. They almost never pan out.<br />
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Keep your spirits up, and darn Im sorry to hear you didnt replace him with a more available guy three months into that journey. LOL...serve him right.<br />
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Take care.