Why Men Want To Share Their Wife With Other Men

I get very excited when watching my wife with another man and when I know she is alone with another man. This excitement is natural and comes from a phenomenon called "Sp*rm Competition". This is where several males compete for the breeding rights to a female. It is a testosterone driven desire and it is far more common then you would think. Men usually have more interest in this when sexually excited or while having sex. Usually is wanes after sex, when their sp*rm count is lower. It is the most common male fantasy but it seldom materializes because of social stigmas. Its like when a child only wants a toy that another kid has. I know my desire for my wife peaks when she is in mid love making with another man. She also says that see feels closest to me while another man is inside her because I trust her enough to let her enjoy sex with other men.

We find that cuckolding, swapping, wife sharing/swapping, sloppy seconds or whatever you want to call it. [We don't find that we fit into the definition of any of the established groups]. Makes our sex very intense and serious. Basically you can not afford to just sport **** your wife because you are competing with other males for the rights to her. It is very exciting for me to know that other men have been inside of her, some without a condom [bare back] and it is my job to reclaim her. In fact the head of the male p*nus is designed to act like a suction pump, perfect for breaking up other males sp*rm plugs, and suctioning them out.

Nature is at work with this fantasy and is prevalent in many animal species, The Zebra and the Chimpanzee being two of the most active in the multiple male department.

Being outside the normal acceptable restrictions that a relationship is considered to be by social standards or what the church considers to be normal. A couple may think that it is abnormal to have thoughts of a wife being with multiple males. In fact it was not uncommon throughout history, for married couples to change partners for the purpose of procreation when one of them was unable. Moses' wife was unable to have children, after many years of trying she gave up and gave her hand maiden to him so she could bear him a son.

In poor parts of the world such as India several men may marry one woman and share her. This allows the work of several men support one woman. She then has a choice of which man to mate with.

To my wife and I its like an amusement park ride, where there is a since of danger, but its an illusion, but still a thrill. After all its my wife and at the end of the day she is mine and will go home with me.

Be careful with your partners, they need to know the part they play. If a guy thinks he has a chance with her and finds out she is just doing this to cuckold her husband, he could be hurt and angry, and you don't want him to feel used or to go public with your antics. He may also enjoy and get off on making your wife used or "Sloppy Seconds" for her husband.

Good luck and happy cucking
deleted deleted
29 Responses Aug 3, 2010

lemme make it clear to you
I'm an Indian and the thing you mentioned about my country is totally wrong.We don't have such a practice and the mentioned facts can be based on an ancient story but that women never had sex with multiple partners.She chose on and decided to be with him as far as I know.
ps: My country is not poor.Its just about some political issues
& as the world itself says we have the best culture
No offence

Its like having your own personal **** star!

I love shareing my wife with other guys an she loves it too an we are happy to do it

I enjoyed your take on it very much and does make sense. I've been trying to understand my husbands sudden desire to share me in this way, when he has always been so possessive and the jealous kind.... it just hasn't made sense to me. I am willing to do this to please him and am kind of acting like the only reason I would is for him. But I must admit, there is some primal instinct in me kicking in, wanting this more and more, but only with him and I want him watching w/ love in his eyes and telling me what he wants me to do and then reclaiming what is his right there and then. The thought of it turns me on so much. He wants to eat a cream pie and maybe watch me do multiple men at a time, even though we have been together for a long time, it has been exclusive. So it would be a great deal like him watching me lose my innocence. Cause I would never cheat or consider such a thing, until now. He is also buying me sexy lingerie and sheer blouses to get ready and as a trial run, wants to have me walk around in public w/ him watching on, in sheer blouses so my nipples show through. His whole attitude has turned around and is very surprising. Watching his excitement over the whole thing makes me happy alone and find myself really wanting to please him with it and feel even closer to him.

I have no desire to watch my wife have sex with another man. The only appeal to me from sharing my wife sexually with another man is the exquisite sexual arousal and excitement she experiences when 2 men are making love to her and from the "naughty" nature of it.

Hoopty, just found your profile reading your wife's bloc. She and other EP friends have inspired my wife and I to enter the shared wife lifestyle and it has brought us incredible joy and happiness. Its great to understand some of the science behind the desire. I just know that its incredibly intense and titillating and it has brought us to new sexual heights in our marriage, which was already rock solid to begin with! Looking forward to reading your many posts and I invite you to read our journey posted in our EP blot and profile. You seem to be blocked from friend requests so I'll leave that up to you. Thanks for sharing such great information!

My Wife & I Have Been haveing Another Guy Join Us From Time To Time we Both Love It & Ebjoy it.. Its A Hug Turn On For Us Both,, Have Been doing It For 21 Years.. With No Regrets..

My ex fell in love with another woman. The problem was that the same woman she was in love with also enjoyed having sex with me, so much so that she wanted me more than she wanted my wife. We had ********** and foursomes with the other woman's husband, but my wife didn't want the other husband, she wanted the woman she had fallen in love with. <br />
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The other woman had told my wife that I was the best she had ever had. My wife agreed that I was a very good lover, but she also loved her. What went wrong was that I knew my wife was in love with this other woman and I didn't feel it was right for her and I to have sex when my wife was so much in love with her. I felt that if she claimed to have the same love for my wife that my wife had for her that I should not be in the way, or cause my wife grief because the woman she loved was more in love with me.<br />
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I respected my wife. I loved my wife, and I wanted her to have what she wanted. When she had other male lovers I was supportive as well. She had three children with other men during our marriage. I enjoyed the fact that throughout our marriage my wife had lovers and boyfriends. I actually liked knowing that when I was at work, when I was in the military, that she was getting gang banged nightly.<br />
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The woman my wife had fallen in love with eventually moved in with us. I thought this would have been a good thing. Turns out that the other woman was having men over and having my wife participate with her and the other men. My wife liked being with the other men, but would have preferred to only be with the woman she loved.<br />
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As time went on my wife and the other woman had sex often with other men. I liked being able to see the men with both my wife and her lover, but I could tell my wife wasn't really getting what she wanted. My wife and the other woman broke up. To this day my ex is still in love with this other woman.<br />
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Soon after I met my current wife, my then wife and my current wife and I had sex quite often together. My then wife was not into Black Men as my current is, but because she still loved me, my then wife had sex with as many Black Men as we had over. In about six months my then wife had had sex with more Black Men than she ever thought she would.<br />
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My then wife realized that my now current wife and I had much more in common and asked me if she and I should divorce. I stated I wanted them both. For about a year the then wife and my current wife and I and our kids lived together, and have of and on for the last five years. <br />
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My ex wife still desires me, sexually, but she knows that my current, having a much higher sex drive, does more for me, in many ways. My ex has stopped having sex, with anyone. She has stated that I was the best she had ever had, but she knows that it would be wrong to only want me for herself. <br />
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My ex fell in love with me, then this other woman. She "lost" both of us. My ex still wishes she could have what she wants, but also realizes that to have a relationship she will have to have sex. My ex wants me and she also wants the other woman, but she knows that both desire more than she is willing to give. Therefore. my ex has become non sexual, for the most part. She has gone out with men and had sex with them just for companionship. She has admitted to me that she has sex with them because they want it. <br />
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I have asked my ex what she would change if she could go back in time. She has said that she wishes she had been more sexual with more men. She told me that the night at the swing club a few nights after she and I had met was amazing. She's had more men in that one night than most women have in a lifetime. My ex stated that she knows that our marriage would have been better had she had more men and regrets not doing so to this day. <br />
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Now that we have been divorced for nearly six years, my ex has had time to think. She has admitted that the sex with me and my current was great because I was involved. She is currently putting ads out on craigslist for men. She feels that if she has sex with more men that she will be more of the kind of woman she was and should be. <br />
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I will admit that my ex is confused, but she also knows that sex is what men want, and if you want to have a relationship, then sex is going to have to be a part of it. When I have known she was out having sex I was happy for her. She may not have known the men she was having sex with, but in the lifestyle you rarely do. <br />
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I may not be married to my ex anymore, but I know that she needs sex. She has admitted to me that she does think about it a lot. She has even admitted that she wants me to set up gang bangs for her and be there when it happens. I like that idea.

With my ex the swinging and swapping lasted for nearly 26 yrs. With my current wife it has lasted 5 yrs so far. Luckily my current wants to play several times a week with several different men.

What happened to your ex?

great thread!!

"What, no one is commenting on the fact that it was not Moss’s wife? Guess there are limited readers of the Bible? The story is about Sarai and her husband, Abraham, she offered her Egyptian handmaiden "Hagar" to Abram. This event is what is the root of the conflict between Muslims and Christians. Hagar had Ishmael, the line of Muslims. Sarai later had Isaac, the line of Christians.<br />
Shows one what happens when the subject of sex is the main topic, we kind of lose our mind."<br />
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And Sarah (Sirai) did not offer Hagar to Abraham (Abram) for sex. That was not AT ALL what it was about. She offered her to him for procreation. To sire a child for Abraham, because Sarah was sterile and could not conceive. It had nothing to do with sex. It was all about procreation. <br />
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Supposedly by the will of God, after Ishmael was born, and when both Sarah and Abraham were VERY old, Sarah then conceived and bore a son (Isaac) to Abraham, but eventually Sarah demanded that Hagar and Ishmael be sent away. Abraham was not in favor of this, but God told him he needed to obey Sarah and do as she wished so Abraham sent Hagar and Ishmael off into the desert. This just goes to prove that if you screw around with other women, and your wife gets jealous, there may be severe consequences which God will support (just kidding ;-) <br />
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"Its the same with nipple play for men and women. That produces a good feeling and the chemical oxytocin which, like testosterone, is very addictive to both all of us. These things are fact, not conjecture."<br />
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Oxytocin is more of a bonding hormone and one that is linked to pair bonding, monogamy, and long term love for partners and children, and not just sexual arousal. Other hormones like testosterone, phenylethylamine (PEA), norepinephrine, dopamine, seratonin, and others, are more addictive and are more related to sexual attraction, arousal, lust, and infatuation. <br />
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Here is a link to an interesting article that discusses these things: <br />
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http://www.mcmanweb.com/love_lust.html<br />
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Additional research has actually been performed since Dr. Fisher's 2002 study which has revealed even more.

When a male thinks his pair bonded woman has had sex with another man or even has had the opportunity to do so, his testosterone levels sky rocket and he become extremely excited. The evolutionary payoff is to let his ***** have a chance to sire the child. For us we just feel the excitement. Women are more apt to have ******* with their lovers than their husbands- if they have a lover- because it causes the cervix to dip into the pool of ***** and helps with conception. Of course they don't know this is what is happening. They just get excited over the prospect. Wise women who want to have a lover have learned that the more they keep their mates aroused, the more the men will encourage them to seek out other lovers. Its the same with nipple play for men and women. That produces a good feeling and the chemical oxytocin which, like testosterone, is very addictive to both all of us. These things are fact, not conjecture. We act like other primates in many ways.

What, no one is commenting on the fact that it was not Moss’s wife? Guess there are limited readers of the Bible? The story is about Sarai and her husband, Abraham, she offered her Egyptian handmaiden "Hagar" to Abram. This event is what is the root of the conflict between Muslims and Christians. Hagar had Ishmael, the line of Muslims. Sarai later had Isaac, the line of Christians.<br />
Shows one what happens when the subject of sex is the main topic, we kind of lose our mind.

Still we share 99.9% of their genes, viva us as we were in the Chimpanzees era.

I really appreciate this story. I came to this group because my ex-fiance wanted to share me, and I was really hurt about it, thinking that he just didnt care about me enough to want me to himself or he just thought I was a piece of trash, so we broke up. <br />
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I am not saying that this story has made me change my mind about wife/girlfriend swapping, but it has given me a better understanding of where my ex was coming from. For me personally, my biggest turn on is to have a guy to want me all to himself, that is what gets me off. So its probably a good thing that my ex and I are not together, he can find someone who is more into this kind of thing, and I can find someone who is more suited to me. <br />
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I really thank you a lot for shareing this, now I know that my ex didnt do it because he thought I was a gutter ****, he did it because it was a competition thing for him. I am still glad that we have broken up, and would like to meet someone who doesnt want to share me, but this story has helped me get rid of some of my feelings of worthlessness. Thank you for that.

Just so you know, it may not have been because of the competition factor. It may actually have been because he was turned on by the idea of you being a "gutter ****" and eventually may have treated you like one if you did it. He also may not have. You will never know. It doesn't mean he saw you as worthless, or that you should ever see yourself that way. It just means he saw your sexual worth in a very different way, and a way you may not have appreciated if you had eventually caved in to his desire to share you. Many women are much more turned on, and feel more appreciated, treasured, cherished, loved and cared for by a man who doesn't want to "share" them sexually with other men and wants her all to himself, so you are not alone. A lot of women I met in the lifestyle wished their husbands were that way, but once it became clear to many of them that their husband didn't want her all to himself, and wanted to share her with other men, and wasn't going to change, she gave into his desires and made the best of it. They believed the alternative was to have a husband who was bored with his sex life and wished he was married to a woman who wanted to be shared. They felt their marriage would eventually end because of this and they didn't want to lose the man they love. This was how I felt as well, until I finally decided I couldn't take it anymore. I left to be with a man who wants me all to himself and doesn't want to share me with anyone else. Sexual compatibility is very important in a relationship. So make sure you hold out for what you want and that the man you love is being honest with you right from the start. My ex led me to believe he wanted to be monogamous until he had roped me in and thought he wouldn't lose me. Then he sprung his true desires on me. I felt very deceived as a result, and he found out that his belief that I would not leave him was totally wrong.

Thank you for the interesting read. It is always good to know that ones or more :) activities are not socially unacceptable but genetically required.<br />
However I would go even further by including shades of acceptability in western cultures in the form of ball room dancing (incld would also be Salsa, Tango, Rumba etc) and how normal it is (and expected) that one man may interupt a couples dancing and get to dance with the beauty, or where a salsera' dancing skills are considered good, if she communicates her desires to the man and other men around (sending cuckold messages by body language and feeding the male competative response ).<br />
Of course, because of other socialising pressures, such as relegion, we have learned to ignor or<br />
even dismiss as immoral these actions. <br />
Recently I had a conversation with a french diplomat and his wife at a function. I brought up this topic during our conversation. Of course my views were belittled by the couple. They believed that there is nothing sexual in modern western dancing, unless the person wants to include it for their own reasons. That going to a disco is paramount to aerobics or stress relief and that I was obviously a sexual deviant (of course being diplomats they never said this, they implied it).<br />
I think that we should have these types of discussions within the mainstream society, but there are too many people that have built there social status, power and influence ba<x>sed upon the 'revelation' and just couldnt contemplate being made to look fools as well as losing that respectability, that their knowledge gives them.<br />
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I wish I could refer to this site for my quotes and references,,,,, but somehow I think that I would be labelled and excommunicated, proberbly lose my job aswell.<br />
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P.S Other cultures, such as the Icelandic (old Scandanavian) and certain African tribes also followed a practice of marrying a woman who was already pregnant, in order to confirm her fertility.<br />
The offspring would be brought up by the husband, without any stigma from there group.<br />
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I wonder the prctice of sharing a woman will return to China ???

My wife, too, is a "good girl" given encouragement and freedom. Once a "good girl" realizes there is no overt stigma in being "bad" once in a while, she will be VERY BAD!

I guess it depends on what you consider "good" and "bad". For many women (not girls) it has nothing to do with stigma since the negative stigma that used to be associated with a promiscuous woman is really disappearing. For most women its about their relationship and what they desire and their sexual satisfaction.

Very interesting hoopty. (Sorry for the bad english, not my first language)I can had the genetic side, the melting of ADN make the race healtier and stronger, but it's not my message. I'm happily married, I think my wife is desirable and very fuckable. Maybe I'm weird twisted, but even if i think women are the most beautiful things in this world, I'm so proud of mine that I dream seeing her enjoying someone else. I love so hard to see her in sex scene, I want to see her with some other mens, used by the group. Maybe I'm wrong, but in other hand, I'm so turn on by women everyday ! But if you give me choice to have sex with a beautiful woman or have sex with my wife with another men, I choose the treesome. And no, I don't have a gay side, I know it cause I had the ''chance'' to experiment it and I declined, because not appeling me a bit. Are I'm just one like that ? If someone have the clue, or the same feeling, please tell me !

Some men have a gay side, but they just don't want to believe it, or they haven't come to terms with it. As a result they don't want to engage in sexual activity by themselves with another man, but they will enjoy seeing another man when he is with their wife, and the husband may eventually give in to his desires and become sexual with the other man, because they feel safer (and less gay) doing it if they do it with their wife present.

Great job!! Thnx! xW

Its quite simple, my wife gets the extra sex that she needs and wants without breaking up what we have together. Most married women need extra but are afraid to talk about it and so either cheat or have deep down regrets. These are not good for the marriage in the long run. We have been part of this lifestyle for years and would never stop as that would be wrong for us.

Where do you get this info.? From all of the women I have spoken to (in and outside of the lifestyle), and there have been very many, very few "need extra". But if this is something you need to convince yourself of to share your wife so you don't feel like you are using her as a sex object just to turn you on more I guess you can believe it.

I'm your age elgoad42 and have been shaing my wife for 7 years now, like to compare notes with you if you like!..............make me your friend and we'll talk!

love all these storys,makes me feel better,at times i thought something was wrong with me,,,,wife is a good girl,she does it every now for me but she is verry hard to get in the mood,a few times she has really got into it,love to hear storys,hope we can do it some more soon,i would like to share storys with some guy ..a little older i am 62,but love sex as much as ever wide likes it as much but harder to get her started,watching her legs around another guy and the look on her face hearing her moan drives my crazy i guess it"s about the best feeling i have ever had in my life,,,,,,,,,i just seem so at ease with her after she has been with a man,never had a black man.i would love for that to happen love to watch his **** slide in and see the look on her face then make love with her after,,,,,even let her be along with another man for two hours is great just love it,,,,,like to chat with another guy that kinda feels like me

"wife is a good girl" - If you are 62, I am wondering what age your wife is to be referred to as a "girl". Husbands who make these kinds of comments don't realize that their comments truly speak volumes about how they view their wife. Have you ever asked her why it is very hard to get her in the mood to be shared? Maybe its because she really doesn't like it and/or isn't comfortable with it, and is just doing it to make you happy because you pushed her into it. You better watch out because that can eventually cause major problems in your marriage when she decides she wants to be a respected, cared for, appreciated, independent, empowered woman instead of just "a good girl" who does things she really doesn't like just for your benefit.

"wife is a good girl" - If you are 62, I am wondering what age your wife is to be referred to as a "girl". Husbands who make these kinds of comments don't realize that their comments truly speak volumes about how they view their wife. Have you ever asked her why it is very hard to get her in the mood to be shared? Maybe its because she really doesn't like it and/or isn't comfortable with it, and is just doing it to make you happy because you pushed her into it. You better watch out because that can eventually cause major problems in your marriage when she decides she wants to be a respected, cared for, appreciated, independent, empowered woman instead of just "a good girl" who does things she really doesn't like just for your benefit.


There is a lot of debate as to the legality of a full face cover or veil. Although it is not stipulated in any religion as a requirement, communities still practice this archaic form of trying to keep your females fidelity . The strange irony is, however that by covering her face the female is now free to roam and nobody knows who she is (just as the venetians did with their elaborate masques).<br />
In Egypt a perfectly respectable wife, out for dinner with her husband will get up and perform with the professional belly dancer in front of an attentive audience, all the while being admired by her proud hubby. I'm sure they go home and **** like rabbits.<br />
I think that we need to get over the socialisation of one man one woman. It will reduce the stress in society.<br />
I dont know if the people in the pics are you, wife and friend but the atmosphere in them is delightful. I think that i will now try and read some more of your interesting profile. :)

There is a huge difference between getting up and dancing with a belly dancer, and ******* another man in front of your husband. I really wish that men who want to share their wives would get over the idea that the only reason people don't want to do this is because of socialization. Many studies have shown that monogamy in humans has become more common as humans have evolved and is primarily rooted in economics, politics, biology, and anthropology. While this is true, some people who share or swap actually decide they don't like it. And believe it or not, some people who've never tried it actually never want to. Some people enjoy monogamy and only having sex with the person they are married to and truly love. They don't want to share or be shared. Why can't some people accept this? Why do they always seem to think that everyone secretly thinks like they do and wants to share/be shared, and just aren't doing it because of society's standards, morals, values or something like that? People who like sharing regularly remind me that everyone doesn't think like me (which I know and accept), but for some reason a lot of people who share, or want to share, can't accept that it works both ways and not everyone thinks like them. BTW - I am positive that isn't the author of this story, and his wife, and friend in the pics. Those pics are from an internet **** site (I think its name is at the bottom of the pics) I have seen before. My ex used to share stuff on there with me when we fantasized, before it became reality.

Atri, You are so right it has to be a 2 way agreement with boundaries and a love and trust in one an other, some marriages do fall apart because of the lifestyle getting to much for one or emotional attachment to a play partner etc.

I'm glad to hear all of you that are like my wife and I. It can be done and for years!

My wife and I have been married 31 years and I have willingly shared her for the last 27 years. We have the most loving, open, honest and caring relationship of anyone that I know. The sharing brought our relationship to a whole new level that I don't think would have been possible without having had the experience. Our only regret is that we didn't start 4 years earlier.

oh god you are so lucky. i wish i could get my wife stasrted ******* other men. we couldn't get started soon enough.we've been married 36 years. i've wanted to see her ******* other men for most of our marriage

I have been sharing my wife for 7 years now and things couldn't be better! You be surprise of<br />
younger men that want my wife!

Hey Hoopty, you have surprised me with your deep and extensive knowledge on the poliandry prevalent in various cultures in the past and even in the present day. <br />
Somehow even the thought of sharing my wife is highly exciting to me. As per what you wrote in your story,you too find it exciting to see your wife with another man.<br />
Do write your experience of sharing your wife. I am sure it would make a tremendous reading specially knowing very well that you will be able to describe the experience in a very detailed way with the kind of fluent command of English language that you have.<br />
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The logo picture that you have chosen showing a lovely young lady with hugh boobs is simply great and highly titillating.

Hi Hoopty, what you write here make a lot of sense to me. We can find examples of one woman, many men even in our Indian mythology. <br />
I have a feeling (no survey done on it yet) that majority of married men somehow fancy their wives being seduced by other men (specially after the marriage gets a little older, 10 years or so!), although apparently they may not agree to such overtures by others.