There's Got To Be A Productive Use For This!

From the time I was little, my mother told me my greatest asset - and greatest liability - is that I bleed for others. While I value compassion, it sometimes get to a level of feeling drained, depleted, and consumed. Even when I was very young, seeing someone in distress, especially another child or an elderly person, could set me reeling for days on end - even if it was just in a movie! As an adult, I literally have to be extremely discriminating about what shows or movies I watch, as a troubling scene can haunt me for sooooo long and I can't shake it. Dreams are my biggest nemesis - they are so cinematic and realistic and can dog me weeks - even months; some have dogged me my whole life. I have, actually, learned to channel this to a large degree - I work with disabled children and adults and being an empath is a priceless tool. In fact, God gave me a disabled child of my own 10 years after I started working in the field - He certainly knew where she best belonged, lol. My biggest frustration is that I go through periods - sometimes with a recognizable trigger, sometimes without - where I feel practically paralyzed by the emotional energy around me. It is much worse when there is not an identifiable person or situation I can pinpoint. I would so love to feel less victimized by my emotions and responses to them. : (
themudderqueen themudderqueen
56-60, F
May 10, 2012