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I Wish My Husband Was Dead

yes thats an awful thing to say and if it really happened im sure i would feel differently but i really am at the end of my tether.

We have 3 kids. Both work, however he does jack s*** for me or them. In almost ten years, have never been taken for a meal, never bought the kids clothes, have had to repeatedly ask him for rent money (i cover all other bills) NEVER does any household chores (that is no exaggeration)

he recently brought a huge dog into our home without my agreement. It stinks, destroys everything and my husband now neglects to walk it. He has had moments where he has had no work so has been feeding the dog our food! This is a dog i depise almost as much as my husband. Ive asked him to get rid of it, he says no

He smokes pot, lies in bed every morning hes not working whilst im sorting out the children

In fact i wonder why on earth i ever got married to him. I find myself fantasising about him having a heart attack or something which i know is abnormal by i loathe him that much. He has never done anything for me and i am contstantly picking up after him, washing his clothes lending him money etc.

My mum and sister think im nuts to stay

Whats the easiest way to leave hm?

*UPDATE*
March 2013 Hes not dead but... we have seperated! Hurrah hurrah

Reflecting on this experience, I can see that I was almost as much to blame for allowing him to treat me like his mother. Its unbelievable to think that when it came to financial and practical responsibilities, he didnt believe he had any. His money was for himself and mine was to cover the bills and keep a roof over his head! Still not getting any help with the kids but am resigned to the fact that I will be a single mum for the time being and couldnt be happier :))
imawinner imawinner 26-30, F 18 Responses Jul 30, 2011

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I am NOT and NEVER leaving my house! My Narcissist husband treats me as a doormat, yet I worked hard, and he was in out of jobs all his pathetic life. When I asked this jerk to leave , guess what- he started to juggle huge numbers he wants, and even bigger numbers I will owe him to support his lazy ***. I won't go to huge detail about the excuse of a marriage I have with this manipulative liar,lunatic and multiply personality-disorder ***. I just PRAY day in and out, my every awakening moment he would soon die from over 45 years of his heavy smoking, not to mention this addiction is so very costly, I could have Porsche the latest model from these money wasted on fancy cigarettes, this idiot of mine constantly smokes.Yet only these innocent woman, or unsuspected men are dying after 2-3 years , some after 10 years of smoking from cancer, yet my husband is fine, which frankly ****** me off! I want to be free of this jerk the sooner the better. Death is one Great answer, it would be such relief for all of us me and our two kids,he never was getting along with, always lecturing both till complete shut down from their end towards him.Why there is no deadly decease claiming him, due heavy smoking addiction?Any idea?

I'm so glad you left him. You sound like a lovely and sound lady. I hate my husband for other reasons but he isn't that ****. So i have real reason to feel guilty about it. When my mum died at 23 I realised it is way to easy to take for granted the people you love and LOVE ISN'T THAT. Good for you and I hope you have an estatically happy life.

Good or you!
I too wish for my husband to just die already. I am afraid that if I leave, he will get back together with hs nasty ex girlfriend,and she will play mommy with our 5year old. To preface this, he has a 23 year old with a previous woman who he raised with this nasty woman or 9 years and the stepdaughter hates me and considers the nasty ex girlfriend her "mommy" even though its not her real mother. We have been together 10 years and the stepdaughter still gets me and alms about the ex girlfriend regularly, they pay golf together etc.
I just don't want to lose my 5year old to this b....ch.
My husband resents my two other children from my I first marriage, 13 and 17, and drinks constantly. He Never talks to me and the only place he will go ith me is to te bar, he does nothing with the kids, and they can't ven have friends over because he gets too drunk and embarrasses us.
Pease pray for me...or give me advise!

Hi there! I know the feeling!Being married for over 15 years to a charming snake who loves attention and making every other women out there feel like they're so special.
Me?I am told many times that he would never have married me. I am called names daily. Is it stupid to stay?

Well you had to raise another kid - HIM! is he still in diapers , on the bottle or is he trained now? lol

You need to leave him!!! Be positive about your situation and think of all the good things that are to come. It will be hard, but it will be so worth it. If you need help, contact your local agency for abused and battered women (Middle Way House Etc.) We all deserve to be happy!!!

I don't wish him dead, just out of my life without affecting it. I don't want my income to change or my kids to miss him or the guilt etc. Since that is not possible maybe he could cheat on me so I'd have an excuse to leave & sue his ***!

i also hate my husband , he sits all day watching tv. dont get off his ***. i do everything and work in a care home , he smokes my cigs and is a waste of space . im 65 and have worked all my life and have saved but he has drunk all his earnings,

How to kill my husband? It was mental-torture being with him... Seem like nice guy but make my life in prison.. No friends at all. No social life. Its all only 2 of us all d time. I told him bout this but nothing work. I wish him drop dead. cannot leave him either. God, sometimes i felt i wanna die!!

Your H is the Narcissist , I am married to one for 34 years. Trust me, divorce is NOT an answer, especially after so many years, all the lawyers will ***** you off all of your possessions. I worked hard for my money and house, and my two cars, while my jerk was sitting in front of his video games, and TV. We are mostly roommates at this point, but I can't give the most of what I have to this lazy *** of mine.

I am hoping death one day soon will claim him, due his heavy smoking. OMG< I could buy latest Porsche from money wasted on constant fancy cigarette smoking ,his life-time addiction. Yet he is fine. I only hear how people after 3-10 years are diagnosed with incurable Cancer due smoking, yet my jerk is lucky so far.

If you in your young 20-30 without much accumulated things to even be mentioned leave, but if you worked as hard (many hours per day) for some good life style and now reaching your 50+, there is NO room for divorce. Besides, if your husband is Narcissist , as mine- that only means- long, painful drainage, that probably would NEVER go away as long as your life goes. it will be always there affecting you and your children.
I will pray harder for Husband to die hopefully sooner. What a huge relief that would be!

Hey sorry to hear your situation. Mine is different and we ARE divorced. Best thing ever. Never had any lawyers involved because there was no property owned etc. I just paid te £700 court fee and got rid of the idiot. I have been single for a year now and it's the best move I made in my entire life. I hope something positive happens for you soon.

It is good to read these posts. It's a lonely place when I don't know anyone who wishes their husband would die. I've been married to this man for 25 years and of those he has worked only a few. So it's only me. He is such a disappointment and, consequently, so is my life. I'm getting a PhD to make sure that my days are filled with good stuff. Recently I bought a nice big monitor and hooked it up to my (our) computer and every morning there he sits in front of this machine reading his political bull about how the world treats the common man badly. Ah ... but he's an artist. But an artist who sells a piece here and there but whose wife pays for everything, including his studio. What? Stop paying for the studio? What kind of monster would do that? Plus, where would he go? To my house and sit in front of that computer that dominates the living room. Why have I not left him after 25 years of marriage? I think I was so traumatized by the break up of my first marriage that I couldn't do it. Plus, I couldn't afford to leave him because he would not leave so that meant I would have to (still does). And, I had 3 kids to take care of. Now I can't leave him because I can't pay for 2 houses ... mine and his and if I don't pay for his (the one we live in now), it would be foreclosed on. Anyway ... I stopped sleeping with him years ago because he snores (excuse) and when he doesn't wake in the morning I thinkhope maybe he died. I actually get my hopes up. But it doesn't happen. Sometimes I wish he would die and then think he'll probably outlive me and maybe that's my just retribution for hoping he would die. I did get life insurance for him just in case. It's just that I'd always hoped for a little more. Some vacations, some fun times at the beach, something ... that I didn't have to pay for.

My , My, My! As horrid as I may sound, last month my husband (only 46 yrs old) plonked down in his recliner and "died" . I have been resenting him for years that I have to be the MAN of the house , I have been sleeping on the floor for nearly 2 years because he disgusts me so and cannot bear the humiliation of him following me into a public place. I do believe I did the right thing to call 911 (they did revive him at GREAT cost and a pacemaker to boot!) Since that episode I have great guilt for being sorry for saving his life. Still, I have been in this void for years, resenting couples who are 'talking to each other', 'playing with thier kids as a family' esp 'kissing each other (even on T.V.)" and believe it or not, just a man caring for his lawn sends me into a rage! Always thinking "they have MY life"! We are homeowners with the shabbiest house in town, my husband cares nothing about his appearance or our home, vehicle etc.He NEVER leaves his recliner but I have to MOVE!

So, is he dead? No, you are not sound horrid. I actually envy you , I wish mine is dead. The husband I've got is the narcissist with multiply personality disorder. I won't go into huge detail about miserable 34 years of marriage to this jerk. I absolutely over the guilt, and don't give any flying sheet at this point what anyone thinks about the wishing death to this excuse of my husband. Besides, death is the ONLY answer for my situation: I worked hard for good life style, while him was doing nothing sitting in front of TV, or his computer , smocking, due which I was having Brest Cancer, I am survivor. Yet he still smokes in the house. I am trying to stay away, so it won't stink as much in my area of the house. Is there any collective prayer, for me finally to get relief from this jerk? Trust me I would be the happiest person on the planet if that happened sooner.

I wish the same, all the time. I want my husband dead so bad. He is a ******* bastard who is a weakling when it comes to dealing with the outside world. I am the only one he can show his anger to because he knows I am going nowhere. God just kill the dog, he has abused me all my married life. Treats me like **** infront of my kids and everyone else. I want him dead right now

Wow! Its so refreshing to know I am not alone. I fantasize also all the time about my husband dying also. He had two scares with cancer and I was hoping that his diagnosis would point to malignancy. I know it's wrong to think this way and I have asked God to forgive me but I pray constantly that he would leave. i dread being around him and his associates, most of his friends and the majority of his relatives or people he calls relatives. I actually love and respect his mother and the majority of his maternal relatives. The other side are jerks like him with no manners. I need to go to counseling to get stronger to tell him to hit the road or start planning on how I can do it. I need a miracle!!!

Tti

Tti

Dump this lazy, pot-smoking MFer & his dog RIGHT NOW. Don't wait. Don't spend one more minute being miserable. He's obviously miserabley unhappy. Do both of you a favor and get out. Just focus on being a mom.

He's not unhappy, she's enabling him to be the pot smoking lazy person he has become. Change the locks, take the dog to the humane society and don't open the door when he gets home. He needs a wake up call and she needs to be the winner she is. I waited for my husband to change. 25 years later, I'm looking to separate. For this woman, the time is now!

you are so right and I have acknowledged that :)

You are not alone. Everytime I look at my husband I wish secretly that he would just drop dead. He has recently been diagnosed with high blood pressure and he keeps eating crap and drinking cases of beer a night, so I keep hope alive.

Hah what would you do if he had a heart attack and he was begging for your hrlp? lol

Me too

I can certainly relate, I dont want my husband dead but I sure would like to see what he would do if I just up and left.