So Unhappy....

Hi, I guess I thought I was the only one who felt like this and I'm glad I'm not the only one, because I was really feeling like there was something wrong with me. I have been with my husband for 7 years but only married for 2 and have a beautiful baby boy. I was in love with the person I met and married. Once I started living with him everything changed. He is a super nice guy and everything but things have changed and he's just not the same person I met. There is always something wrong with him and he always has to be the victim. When I get sick or hurt or tell him how I feel, there is nothing wrong with me. I feel that he is selfish and I feel resentment towards him. I feel like I hate him for not helping me, and I've told him that I fee like I'm a single mom because he's never involved in anything. I am tired of him and our sexual relationship is non-existent, I can't even stand the way he smells anymore, its as if my body is rejecting him. I know I'm not in love with him anymore, and I feel selfish for trying to be happy and live my own life. I feel like I am holding this family together, I'm the strong one in this relationship and feel like it shouldn't be this way. He should be strong for me and take care of me, not the other way around. I feel very unappreciated in this relationship and feel like its not going anywhere. I have continued my education through very difficult obstacles in my life, and am successful in my career. He has been working in the same place since before we got married and is so unwilling to change. He makes excuses for why he can't continue his education and I just can't take it anymore. Lately I've become more cold towards him and I feel bad because I can't feel what he feels towards me. I'm done, and I want out, but I know it'll break is heart. I also feel like my family would judge me and that's the biggest reason why my mouth continues shut. I want to be happy and I hope I can be one day, but right now I don't think I ever will :(
dreamingbutterfly dreamingbutterfly
22-25, F
Jun 30, 2012