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What Is Going On!

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick.  The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal.  Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans.  
 And then the thieves struck again.
My bum was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took  pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier.  But my new bum was attached at least three inches lower than my original, and was at least three sizes bigger! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favour of long skirts.
 Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was drying my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. 
This was really getting scary -  my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?
 When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey’s neck, I decided to tell my story. 
Women of the world wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts - stolen from you and me! 
 The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you? 

THIS IS NOT A HOAX:      This is happening to women everywhere every night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P.S.   Last year I thought some one had stolen my boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just  been hiding in my armpits as I slept. 
 Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.
 Thought this was too 'important' not to pass on.  Have a wonderful day - with a joy filled heart.

P.P.S. - These same thieves came into my closet and shrank my clothes!  How do they do it????

Just thought you should know.

CatchCabby CatchCabby 56-60, F 73 Responses May 13, 2010

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Haha I dont really get i but it was hilariouss

this made me smile its good even though all this is going on with ur body u can still joke about it good for you

This made me laugh!!! Thank you for sharing. I recommend booby traps for these thieves ;)

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Your post is very funny! It made my day, I was feeling a bit down today.

I lost 27 pounds so far and I have 10 pounds to go. It's all about eating small healthy meals often and exercising 1 hour a day 5 days a week.
However, it's easier said than done and there will be the occasional slip ups.

I wish you all the best on your weight loss journey :-)

i want to lose weight in the end,2013 happy new year!

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I know you are serious and struggling with your weight but the way you wrote it .... It made me visualize you as a really happy cute and beautiful person.

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I was just feeling like crap moments ago because how disgust I am with my weight and looks. And out of nowhere I came across this webiste and read your post. I needed a laugh just to get me through today. Thanks so much.

I really loved reading this :) It cracked me up.

Hi Amy, Advocare is definitely the way to go! I'm 5'3 and was 140 pounds and I didn't look right because I was so short. Long story short, I did the challenge and now I'm down to 123 and have lost 27 inches! I encourage you to try this life changing weight loss program...you will not only lose weight, you will have lots of energy! Once you lose the weight, there's also a business side to this...your friends and family will definitely ask how you did it and that will give you the opportunity to share this awesome experience with them and make 20-40% off of customers you bring in. www.advocare.com/120710588 or text/call for more information

LMAO .This is such a wonderful, witty and wry look at ageing....

I beg to differ. getting fat does not equal ageing. It's about laziness and lack of will.

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I am trying this product, but I tell you I am 3 weeks in and I am so frustrated. I have only lost 5 lbs... I don't want to give up but I am frustrated!!!

The only way is by changing your lifestyle not just a diet or a product. You have to gradually change how you eat, and make it a change for life. Start by only eating healthy stuff (mostly home cooked.) Do not eat junk food more than once a week. Eat lots of fruits and vegaties etc. I know it's hard but with enough will power you can do it. Don't forget your regular exercise. Make the changes gradually, only what you can tolerate until you get used to it. I hope this help. Good luck.

I was robbed too! I think it´s the same criminal gang.... they shrank my clothes too :( And just this morning I realized - I have wings and gills...and I think there is growing another pair of boobs on my back......and nothing fits! They turned me to something creepy....

Hi, Advocare is definitely the way to go! I'm 5'3 and was 140 pounds and I didn't look right because I was so short. Long story short, I did the challenge and now I'm down to 123 and have lost 27 inches! I encourage you to try this life changing weight loss program...you will not only lose weight, you will have lots of energy! Once you lose the weight, there's also a business side to this...your friends and family will definitely ask how you did it and that will give you the opportunity to share this awesome experience with them and make 20-40% off of customers you bring in. www.advocare.com/120710588 or text/call for more information

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LMAO! I see you wrote this quite a while ago, but it just popped up on my radar. Brilliant post :-D<br />
<br />
The same gang have been wreaking havoc with my wardrobe too.

StarSecret thank you so much for your kind words - just wish I HAD written this, but alas, I only copied it.<br />
Alex 908, I love to have a laugh too! X@

this really made me laugh... sorry if you didn't mean it as a joke but I needed to laugh today... thanks *smiles*

and now you r 2 years older

LOL, so funny!!!

OMG that is AWFUL! How long has it been going on for? This makes me feel so yucked out because I have a boy in my class who is actually one of my friends and his dad is a plastic surgeon...but he is really nice so it can't be anything to do with him but are you OK that part about the boobs was GROSS!

Love your story!! If you all want your younger bodies back, I'll tell you where you can find them. I don't charge anything for this info. :) Here's what you have to do.... go to Costco.com and buy the time machine. It's called an olliptical machine. It takes a while to recover them, but with some persistence, I guarantee you will find them. I found that if you go back in time about an hour a day, your parts will start returning a little at a time. lol

*giggle* Mewold, me too!

Yup! When I lay on my back, I look like a toad. **sigh.....

What a GREAT story... I loved it! and totally relate.... How did I get from a size 4 to a size 24?? Ugh! The past 15 years it just crept up on me... more and more weight just kept piling on!!! I was at the end of my rope - I have tried EVERYTHING. I finally found something that is affordable and REALLY works, I am currently down to a size 18 and moving down with each application. I stumbled on to it by accident;....OK here is my big secret.... fullbodysculpting (all one word) go to their site - it is easy, fun and WORKS yeah!!!!! Good Bye Thunder Thighs !! :) FOREVER

What a GREAT story... I loved it! and totally relate.... How did I get from a size 4 to a size 24?? Ugh! The past 15 years it just crept up on me... more and more weight just kept piling on!!! I was at the end of my rope - I have tried EVERYTHING. I finally found something that is affordable and REALLY works, I am currently down to a size 18 and moving down with each application. I stumbled on to it by accident;....OK here is my big secret.... fullbodysculpting (all one word) go to their site - it is easy, fun and WORKS yeah!!!!! Good Bye Thunder Thighs !! :) FOREVER

:-D

OH MY GOSH! Who can beat that, a man who is content with his lot - and his tot! I love you man, you make me laugh from the belly out! X@

Hey, I got off lucky. I got more than I lost. My eyebrows are still full, but some of the white ones are 3 inches long and stick straight out. My pubes are now thicker than ever, but straight and stick out 4 inches. Instead of a razor, I now use a lawn mower to cut them. I have to shave because I am now so small, that if I didn't shave, no one could tell what sex I am. And I now have **** that any woman would be proud of. I am also lucky because I can make noises now that I couldn't even dream of when I was young. Yes, these are the benifits of ageing gracefully. Excuse me I got to go poop.