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I Can't Commit to My Goal

I want to lose weight so desperately. I day dream of going back to my old self, from 10 to 12 years ago.  I currently weight 242 Lbs, and I'm 5'7".  Some friends and I are getting together to support each other. Unfortunately none of them are in the same city, I'm actually the only one that doesn't have some peer support in the same city.  But I need to start somewhere, and get as much help as possible. Right?

I want to lose from 99 to 110 lbs in total, but I would be very happy if I could lose at least 30 to 35 lbs by October, one of my friends is getting married, and I want to look as good as possible because I'm actually going out of town to a wonderful and fun city (Dallas), and I want to make the most of it.

I've put my life in some kind of hold for the last 6 to 8 years and I want to take over my life right now-this moment. I'm tired of being the fat girl with the cute face that could be a really attractive girl, or the nice and sweet girl that guys might like, but fat so they pass.

I don't know, I want to meet the right guy and start a family, get the grown up life I've always wanted. I don't want to settle for nothing less, or be contempt with being single for the rest of my life, because I don't want to be single. I want to share my life or the rest of it with someone that will hold my hand whenever I might need it.

I want to live a full life, not just two thirds, or one third of what it could be, not should, because our lives are not carved in stone, but live it the best and most complete I can.  I'm the only one to blame for my lack of self love, for not loving me enough to get rid of the extra weight on time, and for allowing myself to indulge in confort food.  Confort food, can we really call it that? I feel good while I'm eating it, but after it's gone, the guilt and self punishment is twice the size than one I started. I wonder if anyone feels this way, too or it's just me that's weird?


NewLya NewLya 36-40, F 191 Responses Jul 11, 2008

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I was in the same boat as you. Eating crap hating myself for not exercising etc....
But then I got sick of my excuses to myself got sick of not liking what I saw in the mirror. I started of by at least doing something each day that worked up a sweat which wasn't hard to achieve walking around the block made me look like I had been running for hours hahaha. An app called fitness pal helped me take note on what I ate which helped loads because it actually made me think about what I was eating. Mc Donalds Big Mac or Chicken Breast Green Beans the healthy choice won..... you can do it believe in yourself good luck... :)

A healthy loss schedule is 1 pound a week, its how I aim and calculate my life, you have to remember that there are 3500 calories in 1 pound of fat, so if you want to drop 100 pounds, its a lot of calories to burn. 100 pounds, 100 weeks, thats almost 2 years.

It took you a long time to get where you are it will take you some time to go the other direction.

Emotional eating is fairly normal these days, when I pickup something and I know im eating that way, I ask myself why am I eating this, Do I need it, do I want it, will it make me feel better.

I eat emotionally all the time and it sucks. Its a way to cope with the things in life that come your way, some gamble, some do drugs, some have sex.
We eat, so now that we know why we do it, now is the time to change it.

Be strong and ask questions, im always around. Been down this road several times.

All you need is healthy thinking. Don't count the ponds you want to lose. Just start living fit. Start of with just walking 20 minutes a day. I lift weights & do my cardio in between my lifting for better results.

I totally get where you are coming from. I have put my life on hold to some degree for 20 years. I am an attractive woman who has over 100 + pounds to lose and I can't manage to commit to any type of weight loss plan. I am 5'9" and I weight 280 pounds.

I am miserable and you would think that misery would be the catalyst to motivate me to lose this isn't.

When I was younger I was athletic and I miss that. I don't want to die this way and for the life of me, I can't figure this out. My mother passed away at a young age of heart disease (54), and I fear that I am following in her foot steps. Again, you would think that would motivate me as well...what is wrong with me?

I have tried to work out with an exercise buddy and ultimately I end up losing the desire to workout with my partner and I truly do not understand why that is. Why am I constantly sabotaging myself?

I have a husband, kids, grandkids. I have a skill, I have a degree, I have a good job. I feel that I have plenty going for me, but there is this dark cloud constantly looming over head and its' name is "obesity." All I think about day and night is my weight and why I can't seem to get it together, get motivated to lose this weight. Much more than that, why can't I get motivated to just become healthier?

I feel your pain and I hope and pray you are able to overcome this and live the life you want to live.



If you would like a little motivation to carry on your goal you should follow me on facebook. I am a Beachbody coach who posts daily reminders and little motivational posts to keep others on track with their weight loss and fitness goals. I would love for you to follow me and ask me anything you want to know about health and fitness.


Hello :)
I am a Fitness Coach :)
In order to make your metabolism work more efficiently you should eat a little healthy snack once every two hours. Make sure its healthy though! :) You can do it!
If you want I can sell you Herbalife. Its a protein meal replacement shake. I promise its tasty. I can sell it to you for what buy it for, I wont gain any profit because I want to sincerely help you :)

I will help you with your journey while getting in the best shape of your life, one day at a time,free of charge..
contact me via email...
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live, love and laugh often...sincerely Paul Banaduchi

i knw how you can loose weight and the diet is called nutrilite let me know if you are interested

Hi I'd like to help u when will u be online so we can talk

This is very inspirational. I hope that you were finally able to lose the weight like you wanted to. this inspires me to atleast try and stick to my diet and exercise plan

Hey NewLya! I really enjoyed reading your post, it was inspiring and I'm so glad you had the courage to share! I would love to talk to you more about getting healthy, leading an active lifestyle and finding love within yourself! If you want to connect over email that would be awesome! I look forward to hearing from you!

I have also changed my lifestyle no diets for me with Visalus or the Body By Vi challenge i am down 75lbs and considering i have celiac disease, anemia and am lactose intolerant i will consider this major success i am not done yet every 90 days its another 25-30lbs and it was so easy and delicious i share my recipes and food does not control me anymore as a 40 year old nana this has been years of low self esteem, failed relationships and so much else and food was my crutch not my comfort i just did not see where that was taking me if you want to chat and learn more i am happy to make new friends and share hints and tips and recipes with anyone wanting to join me on the challenge or not I Know in my heart that Visalus will help me save my life and extend it to enjoy my husband children and grandson but the road i was on was going to cost me all i loved most.

I honestly feel you and I know where you're coming from. I too was feeling the same way. I am currently 5'9 and I weighed 300lbs. Now this is what I tried because I've cried myself to sleep many of nights because of my weight. I had men look at me in disgust because of my weight and I really want to settle down. I've tried diet pills, Sensa, slim fast, weight watchers, etc! My depression got the best of me. So my cousin on Facebook Victorious-One Scott told me about this shake mix that taste like cake mix. It is called Body By Vi and I'm thinking to myself what makes this any different? So she invited me over to house and made me a shake. It was sooo good! So I was like how much do it cost? She said any where from $49-$299 depending on my budget. So I was like ok I'll try it since I've tried everything else. So I joined her team and I drinking the shake helped me manage the way I eat better. So I take a shake for breakfast and add some fruit to it to spice it up (my opinion), and then a gronola bar. Then for lunch I'll have a sub sandwich and some fruit. Then for dinner I'll have some baked Tilapia, steamed vegetables, a baked potato, and my second shake. I change my meals everyday though. But still eating the same just in moderation has helped me tremendously! I have been on her team for a month now and I have lost 25lbs so far! I am currently 275lbs. I'm loving the new me so how about joining the Challenge with me? I'll be your support system. Just go to my cousin Victorious-One Scott page and she will give you more information if you're interested. I hope this helped.

I am also desperate, but somehow struggle with self discipline when it comes to food. My energy levels are low and I am getting asocial. I want to wear beautiful clothes again.
OK, let`s do this. We want to be healthy! I hope you are on your way to a thinner, healthier YOU. Do not cheat. There are a lot of women that are struggling with the same problem. Let we show them we can and they can!

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But has anyone of you all used any diet pills? I heard that natural weight loss pills are a good solution.
My friend who was also 235lbs used Mega Hoodia she bought on and she lost 60lbs in 2 months.
I think it's not bad at all.

I also am hveng a hard time losing weight. I hve lost 25 but hit a Plato I need to lose another 25. I workout but do seen to get anywhere. I weight 175.

I'm going through the same thing... I've put on a lot of weight over the past two years, and I want to get it off before college, but can't commit. Every morning I wake up and tell myself I'm going to diet right today, but by the afternoon I've had a day full of self-loathing, self-consciousness, and I'm downright exhausted. I always indulge in something I shouldn't - ice cream, tasty cakes, etc... And I keep going until I can't eat anymore. And then I feel even fatter, hate myself even more, etc... It isn't comfort food, it's dangerous food. I can't keep it out of my house because I live with small children, but if you can, you should. I know this didn't help much, but hopefully you won't feel alone anymore (:

i feel the exact same way!!

My name is Misty I am an RN. BSN and I know exactly what you are going through! A few years back I was at my heaviest and I worked out constantly and was getting now where! The exact same thing happened to my Best Friend in the world. We live 3,000 miles away we would get on the phone together and work out lol.....Until we decided to try a product called ViSalus. It is a nutritional supplement and a 90 day challenge! It is extremely healthy for you and not only will yo loose weight you will be fit and tone and feel healthier not as sluggish, have more energy, just overall health! There are many different recipes that you can try! I know some people who have a very strong sweet tooth and there is a recipe for a butterfinger shake and yes it sounds unhealthy but IN FACT IT IS NOT!<br />
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Hello NewLya i hope you are doing well<br />
what i can tell you is : losing weight is not an easy thing but with selfconfidence and exercises <br />
you will accomplish your goal<br />
i think (from my own experience) what is the important point is how to stay motivated (you can read this article ) and keep exercising until getting the goal.<br />
step one : Draw your abtainable goals <br />
step two : exerises<br />
and you will see the results <br />
Good luck ;)

I agree with you, sometimes exercise can be a best workout for your weight loss goal. Choosing healthy food plan like low fat dairy products, salads, and etc. maintaining a healthy diet is always keep you fit as your technique.

Losing weight is a lifestyle change. It's not how we eat so much as how much nutrients our bodies get from what we eat no matter what we choose. Now of course the healthier choices are obvious, and are always well recommended. But how much of that quality goodness is your body absorbing? That's the more important factor.<br />
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I'm Peter and I can help you with your weight loss agenda, Please visit to get started on your way to better health, Choose the ultimate weight loss starter pak and get yourself back to your desired weight. All our products are backed by a 30 day guarantee so you have nothing to lose, ( other than weight) and only your health and peace of mind to gain.<br />
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I can help you meet your goal with this program Ive been on. I lost 30lbs in a couple months and have kept it off for a year. Its not a diet and its healthy for you. If your interested let me know.