First Love Yourself

I desire so very much to be loved. I realize that having that someone special in my life is what I am missing and have been for so long. Yes, I have made mistakes in my past, trying to buy love. I wanted it so badly, wanted someone to accept me as I am. So I had to take some time off and clear my head, reevaluate myself, look at myself in the mirror and learn to love me. I had to let go of all the pain I endured. I came to understand the woman I am, the woman God made me to be. So many times my kindness is taken as a weakness, so many times I am overlook because I am not a flashy type of lady(please do not misunderstand me,being beautiful on the outside is a wonderful thing) but what makes me beautiful, and so sexy has everything to do with whats inside of me, and it takes someone spending time with me, to realize this about me. And in this world today I feel no one has the time, if it is not eye catching then you are not notice. See I was raised by a woman who taught me all that I know about being a woman/lady and how to love, how to give love, how to love unconditionally. For so long I did not understand who I really was, why I had this passion, this passion that comes from within. Why I wanted to give all of myself, it did not depend on his job, bank account, It was all about his heart. I was raised that when you truly love someone his job did not matter, if he was a ditch digger to encourage him to be the best, to never talk down to him, to stand with him, to love him through the good and bad times. Realize that no one is perfect and I am not perfect myself. To respect him as a man. I know in today's world it is all about your financial status, but I feel if you love someone, if we are a team we can take what we both have and make it happen for us, not depending on what others think what we should have, but what we feel in our hearts what we should have. I often ask myself does true love still exist? Yes, it does. It just takes so much longer to find it now, And if it something you desire so much, if it is within you. You will have it. I now realize that my kindness, caring ways, my good intention, the way I make others smile/laugh, my strength, my faith, my intimate relationship with God, has made me the woman I am, and that I was made to love, to give all that is within me. I do not know where he is, but I will not stop until he is right here next to me. I know God made someone special for each of us, we were not made to be alone. It may take some us longer than others, but we should not give up. We all have the desire deep inside to just be loved for who we are, so many just give up, but than there are others like me who cant give up. My advice to anyone who truly desires to love, to be loved, to give love, do not give up. If things did not work out in the past, it was not who God had planned for you. But do not let one mistake maybe two or more cause you to give up on what is so real, so true to you.
wildflower62 wildflower62
46-50, F
1 Response May 21, 2012

Your post made me smile, thank you for these kind words. Today, sadly, love has been completely perverted by the media and the media-induced people, but that still doesn't mean it's not there anymore, it's just much more difficult to find your soulmate, because too much people tend to to hide under a mask that fools us into thinking that they are indeed our soulmate now.<br />
I wish only the best to you, keep on livin'!