Does He Ever Think Of The Consequences?

My husband has the potential to be a very smart man but he is an alcoholic and it muddles his thinking. I find that he can be very kind and loving but sometimes he can be so Dumb! He is retired from the Air Force and has not adjusted his spending to accommodate the serious pay cut. As a result, he has run up almost $45,000 in credit card debt. We have not yet combined our finances because he is worried I am going to try to 'control' him. The truth is... I would love nothing more. We wouldn't be in this predicament. He has agreed to stop using his credit cards and although he brings in more money than I do, he never has any. I pay all of the bills for our house, electric, gas, water, etc. Today I went to buy groceries and my debit card was not in my wallet. Initially I thought I just misplaced it. I had to use a credit card to pay. (Thank God I had one with me.) When I got home, I looked at my account on line. There were some unrecognized charges on my account. After wracking my brain to be sure that these weren't just charges that were delayed in coming through, I decided I had better call the bank. The charges came through today when I didn't have my card. I was just about to cancel the card and dispute the charges when my husband came in. I asked if he had my card. I told him I was ready to cancel it because I thought it had been stolen or misplaced. First he tried to convince me that we talked about it and I told him he could take it, which was just crap. Then he laughed at me for thinking that someone would just take one card. I told him I thought maybe Ileft iit behind. He basically stole the card from my wallet without even caring about what I would use or if there was even any money in the account. I am so sick of him and his self-centered ways. I am not a violent person but all I can think about is punching him in the face!!!!!!!!! Am I wrong to be upset?
An Ep User An EP User
1 Response Feb 16, 2013

Switch banks honey, don't tell him where, hide the card separately, keep the pin secret. You can't enable him. I did it and he got the picture very clearly without any words.