Faking It

I know that if I ever ran or checked out in another way, people would be shocked.  I don't give any indication of how close to the edge I am.  I know how to fake it so well.  People think I am always up and happy and friendly.  Sometimes I wish they could tell, so I could have help working through this, but they don't.  My kids and grandkids are the only things I really keep going for.  If I didn't have them, I think I would have given up a long time ago.   I just keep telling myself, all things must pass, and this will too.  I'm just getting too tired to make the effort much anymore.