Please Accept This Gift...

I met him when I was in elementary school.

He was a complete stranger back then, I didn't know him and I didn't even know his name.

But He knew my name, and he knew me before I even got the chance to introduce myself.

He started bugging me, like what most boys did in that age. Bugging girls.

I was a silent person back then, no one wanted to come close to me because they thought I'm a mute or something.

But he didn't. He bugged me like I'm just a normal person. He didn't mind all the things most people said to him about me.

It was so sweet of him. I know.

But It did bug me so much because I didn't like that kind of treatment.

We kept on being in the same class till junior high.

I was still the silent person that was neglected at class. He was the only guy that even realized that I existed.

I realized that I liked his attention. And deep inside (he didn't show it, though) he was (hopefully, until now) a really nice person. Caring, faithful, patient...

I knew I loved him. 

I knew that when I saw him again the next day. I started to think more about him as my heart beats faster for him.

He dried my tears when I was sad. He made me smile as hopes filled my days again. He was everything that matters to me.

What was most painful in my life is that knowing that he didn't love me back.

He loved me, but in a i-love-you-because-i-care-for-you

He had this crush on a girl in my class. This petité, cheerful, sunny and perfect girl. The girl that I will never be.

I let my heart breaks slowly and let the pain be there. Such a maschochist I was.

I was going to a different high school while he stayed in the same school.

In high school, I didn't bother to contact him. I thought that maybe I can forget about him by that.

And I was lying to myself.

I made a new image at school. As the sunny girl that is funny and fun.

I got the chance to show the real me. The sunny personality that hides inside me this whole time.

And it's because of him.

Everybody thinks that I'm a fun person and I make new friends.

Thank you.

But everynight when the first year I slept with the pain in my heart ripping every bit of me till tears came out and made my pillows wet.

And I said that everything is going to be OK.


It didn't.

He went to his homecountry (his family lived outside the country) in the second year of highschool.

I didn't cry because of that, because tears didn't fall. I just sulk and had this bad mood for the whole week.

I lost him.

Now for good. 

Eventhough I know that he's still alive and I can see him. I don't think that it will be soon.

Three days ago was his 17th birthday. 

I didn't know how to contact him since it was like he seperated himself from the world also. 

I don't have anything to give. So I decided to give this story as gift. So that everybody will know that there are guys like him. That there is always a sweet thing to look forward to in this selfish world.

Happy birthday.

I love him and I will always remember him as the guardian angel that changed my whole life. A person that was sent from God to me for 4 sweet-full-of-smile-laughter years. 

The years that I will always remember as the years I learned about love, how to enjoy life, and how to be who I'am.

I don't have anything to give for his birthday and to thank him for everything that he has done.

Please accept this gift that eventhough it's just words tied up together...
Headphonesasvictim Headphonesasvictim
18-21, F
1 Response Jul 28, 2010

argh your so sweet :((