Dear Daddy

Dear Daddy,

What I'm about to say is what I've been going through.
All the things I've seen and thought since the day that I lost you.

It was late the other night, when I got that call.
The Officer said you were gone. and my world began to fall.

I fell to the bed and lost my breath.
I could only stare at the wall, I honestly had nothing left.

I couldn't move, I couldn't talk.
I tried to stand, but couldn't walk.

Why did this happen?! What do I do now?
What do I tell mom..and how..

I've never been this low before, or shed so many tears.
I swear I loved you everyday of my life, all my 21 years

Now here I am, wearing black. Walking to your wake.
I try to turn back but mom won't let me, and I begin to shake.

I get inside and it's so cold..and I see you laying there..
Afraid to get any closer, but you're my dad, I shouldn't be scared.

You look like you're smiling...the way you always were.
Please daddy just wake up, so I don't have to hurt.

I can't believe what I'm seeing, this has got to be a dream.
All these people here for you, while you so peacefully sleep.

And I wrote you a letter daddy, and I brought a photo of you and me.
I put them in your hand, hoping soon that you will read.

Now here we are behind you, as we're driving to your grave.
Where I'll pay my last respects, where in the earth you'll lay.

Beautiful words are spoken, some of the last tears are shed.
But they don't know how I feel, or what's going through my head...

Like how the day before I lost you, that evening you tried to call me.
I didn't bother to call you back, and I've never feel so guilty.

But today I did call you, just to hear your voice...
I even left a message, telling you of my pain and void.

I miss you so much dad. No matter what, you were always around.
I just want one more hug from you, and to hear you say "I love you Leigh"... such a beautiful sound.

Dad, I know we had our problems, but none of it matters anymore.
It just makes me sick to think, I never said the things I should've said before.

It's all like a bad dream. But there is no waking.
God I want you home so bad, because my heart is breaking.

I placed my hands on your casket, and whispered, "I love you dad, I miss you".
I hated leaving you there like that..but I promise I'll come visit, very, very soon.

As I came home, I looked at the pink roses that you planted for me.
Like our love, they just keep growing. And that's how it'll always be.

With all my love, your daughter,

I wrote this the week my Dad died, in 2008. He was killed in a car accident. This crappy poem doesn't even begin to describe the pain I felt, or what I still feel now. I miss him beyond words.


LC87 LC87
22-25, F
6 Responses Jun 22, 2010

i wat a new dad can play with m y butt and play with my ****

I'm sorry for your lose... I read ur poem and it hurts me inside... My dad in 2007 had an anyrusm stroke which has a 90% death rate... he went to two hospitals... by ambulance both times. first to milford regional than to umass... life flight was grounded due to terrible weather... i felt so bad.... when i heard he was going to die... he flat lined on the operating room table afew times... he lost some of his memory but has made an almost full recovery... thank god he survive... i couldn't imagine my life without him... i know the fear of loosing ur father... i wish i could help comfort u... if u ever need to talk just send me a message and i'll listen... if i could if i knew u before this i'd tell u to call ur dad, and keep him off that road that day... once again sorry for ur lose and i'm here if u need to talk to someone

Every time I go back to the day when I got that phone call from my oldest brother, I was in my office one Sunday morning going about my business as usual. I had just sat down at my desk with my coffee and got the receipts from the day before, put them in order and then the phone rang, I answered and it was my brother and he asked if I was sitting down and I said ummm I'm in my office and I am at my desk, what do you think? He said I have some bad news and I couldn't think of anything that can be that bad, specially hearing form my brother on a Sunday morning and he aid dad passed away and all I could think of is that I just saw dad two weeks ago, we had lunch and spent the day talking and going to the beach where I spent my teen years during the summer and we talked about the past when I was a boy holding his hand while we walked the beach with my dog.<br />
<br />
I contacted my assistant and said I have a family emergency and that I needed to leave, he took over and I left for the town he was in to ID his body at the mortuary and on my way there I was hoping it was mistaken identity and I arrived and the director brought me to the room and I pulled back his sheet and there he was, a million things ran through my head and all I could think about is making sure he was taken care of, the mourning and such had to wait. So you see Leigh, I know how hard it was and still is form time to time and I want to share this with you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Living Years lyrics<br />
Every generation blames the one before<br />
And all of their frustrations<br />
Come beating on your door<br />
I know that I'm a prisoner<br />
To all my father held so dear<br />
I know that I'm a hostage<br />
To all his hopes and fears<br />
I just wish I could have told him<br />
In the living years<br />
More crumpled bits of paper<br />
Filled with imperfect thought<br />
Stilted conversations<br />
I'm afraid that's all we've got<br />
You say you just don't see it<br />
He says it's perfect sense<br />
You just can't get agreement<br />
In this present tense<br />
We all talk a different language<br />
Talking in defence<br />
CHORUS<br />
Say it loud<br />
Say it clear<br />
You can listen as well as you hear<br />
It's too late when we die<br />
To admit we don't see eye to eye<br />
[| From: |]<br />
So we open up a quarrel<br />
Between the present and the past<br />
We only sacrifice the future<br />
It's the bitterness that lasts<br />
So don't yield to the fortunes<br />
You sometimes see as fate<br />
It may have a new perspective<br />
On a different day<br />
And if you don't give up<br />
And don't give in<br />
You may just be O.K.<br />
CHORUS<br />
I wasn't there that morning<br />
When my father passed away<br />
I didn't get to tell him<br />
All the things I had to say<br />
I think I caught his spirit<br />
Later that same year<br />
I'm sure I heard his echo<br />
In my baby's new born tears<br />
I just wish I could have told him<br />
In the living years<br />
<br />
may your pain subside in peace



Very very sad ! I can't say anymore !