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Emotion Turning Back On Itself, And Not Being Expressed, Is The Element Of Madness.

If he is upset about something, he lets the entire world know it but when I ask him, he will not tell me what is bothering him! I have conjured up a few potential causes for his sulking… Maybe he really doesn’t know why he is upset, or even know what it is that he is feeling at all. I know that throughout his childhood, his parents were drug-addicted losers who never wanted to have anything to do with him. As long as he was quiet and didn’t bother them, he would be able to stay in their good graces. This long term, forced stifling of emotion could have formed tough to break pattern, but at what point does my guidance toward healthy emotional behaviors form a deeper path in his brain than the unhealthy paths worn by his mother. I am not a mind reader; I may be intuitive and be able to figure it out eventually… but why? His silence just causes superfluous frustration, and bottling it up does not keep it in forever. Eventually it is going to come out, you might not know where, when, how or who is going to be on the receiving end of his wrath but it almost always ends up being me. 
TypicalPisces TypicalPisces 31-35, F 3 Responses Jul 11, 2010

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Hi TypicalPisces<br />
you ask: "at what point does my guidance toward healthy emotional behaviors form a deeper path in his brain than the unhealthy paths worn by his mother."<br />
Interesting question!<br />
One possibility is you see the changes taking place you want but from what you say that does not seem to be happening.<br />
Another possibility is he is already deeply programed and cannot change but people are not computers and you are strong willed and caring.<br />
Perhaps the most likely outcome is he keeps the old programming and new ways of thinking and feeling too. Probably always a battle.<br />
Ask him? Does he see the problem?<br />
Very best wishes<br />
:)

Maybe you need to seed faith in your relationship, Honey we have the most wonderful relation I know, I am so luck we are together, I love you, I love it when you tell me how your day was, <br />
All I am saying is if you love this guy then believe you can make things better, he can't help but to follow your lead. One day he will be ready to open up, and grow with you. So when you look back on your lfe together you will harvest the stuff dream are made of. "love"

Mayb he needs to feel safer, like u won't overreact. Sometimes drug addicts/alcoholics overreact to stuff they don't want to hear, like yr feelings, which they might be trying to put a damper on.