Its High Time...

Its irrational that i am so afraid of failure! I'm dissatisfied in life, i know this and i feel this. I yearn for more for... something!! And yet i don't take the necessary risks, but its high time i did!!!! After all I can think of more reasons to take the risks than not to, how bad can it be after all?! Besides what are the options.. doing the same old things and getting nowhere?? Nooooooo! I cant stay in the 'safe' zone forever! Safe, I have learnt, is not where happiness lies And I soooo wanna be happy!!!!

reach for the stars! oh i'm gonna : ) 

cloudlessworld cloudlessworld
31-35, F
5 Responses Feb 17, 2010

I don't know if my story helps but here goes. Years of carrying around the weight of fear. Fear that made me angry and bitter at my own perceived weakness to break out. Fear that made me bury my feelings under a la<x>yer of drugs. <br />
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What changed was the realisation when I was asked "are you happy". My immediate response which shocked me was; " I don't know, I've never done happy". No flash of lighting but a slow understanding that I needed to find some joy in my life. <br />
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In time I began working on myself, just small steps. Started to go to NA meetings. Started to explore all aspects of spirituality. Mostly shifted myself into a place where I attracted only positive things into my life. This is all work in progress but it's t<br />
He start of a journey. Yes, for me risks too in breaking down the walls and opening myself up. <br />
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When I despair, and I do that still, I try not to be so hard on myself. I reflect on the good things in my life t.hat have come about by the little I have done. <br />
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Today it's brought me here-)

i can completely relate to this...you wrote this awhile ago - hope youve been able to start challenging yourself and are feeling more fulfilled. best wishes :)

read the article... fantastic! thanks for sharing : ) it so rings true with meeeeeee! its a lovely feeling when i stretch myself but then i dont do it often enough?! this bit - 'You’ve settled. And a little part of your soul dies' so very true!! but you are right, small steps and do-able tasks to start with. go us!!!!

I am kinda at a similar place in my life. I am trying to break out of my shell and go for the things I really want even though they scare me. I am starting small and going to try to build up to bigger more marvelous risks.. I find that what works for me is trying not to overthink something and just do it instead of going over all the scary questions in my head. like overcoming shyness for example. questions like what if they reject me blah blah.. just tell myself so what? and dont dwell on any of it. i wanna be more action oriented and less living in my head. here's a blog article i read that kind of inspired me in this direction, you might like it:<br />
http://www.illuminatedmind.net/2009/10/01/your-comfort-is-not-important/

i risk nothing... but i want to be something! time i took a few more risks methinks thanks : )