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I Want to Watch My Wife Have Sex

Things She Did Make Me Think She Loved Our *********

By: ward
Written on December 30th, 2006
By: ward
Age: 56-60 , Male
2,691 people have read this story

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31 responses
  • ladyblue848

    I agree with much of what you said cortey, but something I learned from the women I got to know in the lifestyle is that for the most part what they want, and how they feel about things often differs from one woman to the next. There were some perspectives that it seemed like almost all of the women I knew shared, but how they felt about their husband's involvement, and what they wanted from him, often differed. Some women wanted their husband to exert complete control, while others resented it and wanted more freedom. On the other hand, some women who had complete freedom and control resented it and wanted their husband to step up and exert more control and domination over them.



    I think that if the couple is totally on the same page in terms of what they want in the lifestyle and how to do it, and they are completely open and honest with each other about how they feel about everything, and can communicate very well so everything is certain, and they have no hidden agendas or issues, things will work out well.



    Sadly, from what I learned from getting to know many of people in the lifestyle who opened up to me and communicated to me about their true feelings, that was somewhat rare. Many of them had issues and resentment, or they had secret agendas or desires that they never felt comfortable communicating to their spouse, or didn't communicate clearly enough for their spouse to understand, or they just didn't value and respect their spouse enough to care about how they felt or what they really wanted.

    Sep 28, 2011
    2 likes
    • ward

      Oh yes, I have to agree that communication is most important.

      Sep 28, 2011
      1 like
    • Maxnoir

      ladyblue... you demonstrate you have a lot of experience with this... I'll have to follow your trail to learn more about your story.

      max

      Oct 22, 2011
      1 like
  • ladyblue848

    It honestly sounds to me like she was falling for your friend Dave emotionally. She may recognize that now and see it as a risk that comes with what you want so she is resistant to doing it again out of fear it could jeopardize your marriage. It may also be that she doesn't want to admit to you that she fell for him emotionally out of fear that it will hurt you which is why she is holding back.



    Lots of women I knew in the lifestyle fell for the guy who was more dominating, and therefore more masculine, to them. Particularly if they are woman who are more attracted to a somewhat dominating man who doesn't want to share them, and the other guy comes off that way, while the husband essentially says "sure, do whatever you want even if it is deceptive, disrespectful, and somewhat humiliating to me". If your wife feels this way also she may not want to go there again out of fear that the same thing could happen and it could ruin your marriage. Particularly if the guy she hooked up with was single and she was therefore free to have more than just a sexual relationship with him.



    The fact that your friend Dave was married may have been what saved your relationship with Julie, because if he had been single she may very well have ended up with him instead of you.

    Sep 28, 2011
    2 likes
    • ward

      Yeah, she often said she fantasized about having him to herself. It's kind of pointless to speculate about what might have happened if Dave had been single, but if she had ended up with him instead of me, that wouldn't have been the first GF I lost, so...there are plenty of women around, eh?

      Sep 27, 2011
      1 like
    • ladyblue848

      That's true. There are plenty of fish in the sea and I am sure you would have found another to reel in, if Dave had reeled her in.

      Sep 28, 2011
      1 like
    • courteyxx

      The crux of the matter is contained in your comments, Ladyblue, deception and disrespect. My wife and I did this for years and we will do it again. Our relationship grew stronger as a result. There are some truths, I believe. If you and your wife decide to take part in this buffet of sexuality, you cannot restrict her to enjoy only this part or that part of the dinner. True joy is had when she consumes what she wants and throws herself back into your arms with eagerness, abandon and desire. It is the same as if she were enjoying her man with another woman. Would she ask her man to only enjoy that woman with 20% of his desire. The idea is ridiculous. Your wife is your partner with a full functioning sexuality all her own. She was created that way. Enjoy it. Encourage it and it will remain there for you both to revel in.

      Sep 28, 2011
      1 like
    • ladyblue848

      "True joy is had when she consumes what she wants and throws herself back into your arms with eagerness, abandon and desire" That is understandable, but not guaranteed, and at times you really won't know. Some women who I knew in the lifestyle who preferred another man, or were falling for another man would throw themselves back into their husband arms and pretend they were doing so with eagerness, abandon, and desire, because they knew it was what he wanted so they could keep on getting what they really wanted. You'll never know for sure. Its always risky. People avoid risky behavior because they don't want to suffer the potential consequences. It doesn't always mean they are giving up something they really want. Sometimes they are just giving up something that isn't that important to them or that they can get in less risky ways. If that is the case, why take the risk? Because if you do you may end up suffering the consequences and wishing you hadn't.

      Jun 15, 2012
      1 like
    1 More Reply
  • ward

    Well Jones, you have a point there. We made some great memories and still chat about those lusty days, twenty-some years back. Thanks for commenting.

    May 11, 2011
    1 like
  • Jones47

    It has been over four years since this orginal story and a recent update in Feb of this year. The problem you encountered with Dave, I contends may happen quite often in this life style. The desires of the husband leads to the lost of his wife sexually and in some cases it may lead to divorce, because she starts loving her lover more than you.

    Apr 25, 2011
    2 likes
    • ladyblue848

      Well we know that is true in my case, don't we Jones . . . ;-)

      Sep 27, 2011
      1 like
  • ward

    Posted by LonelyX3 on Feb 26th, 2011 at 9:42PM



    ********** are different for everyone. Some are as Willboo stated he preferred yet some are more of a bonding between the couple with the addition as a toy... It's suppose to be a *********... not a twosome. A real ********* all three participate... sounds like Julie got caught up in him and he loved that she did. He had his wife but enjoyed everything he wanted with your girlfriend anytime he wanted. From what you've said I doubt she could resist him but knew she couldn't have him only enjoy him and she did so at every opportunity.



    She may be afraid of her feelings and how she lost control of them before. Some couples find it more appealing to only do it a couple of times a year with different men without the chance of an intimate connection forming only great sex that you both have discussed and know what is desired before hand. Most couples who do this end up having awesome sex together after the addition has left as they discuss it and connect in it, but what you shared before seems to have been moreso lovers than players and if she would sneek out to **** him then you weren't connecting with her in it at all. Sounds like it was more what Dave wanted than what you wanted. Next time make sure it's understood that you share in all of it





    @Lonelyx3: Thanks for the objective viewpoint. You nailed it pretty well; I mean that you judged what was going on pretty well, especially that second to last line in your comment about it being "more what Dave wanted" than what I wanted. You confirmed what conclusions I've been able to draw out of my memories.



    It was terrific to see how excited she got around Dave, but it was a bit painful too, getting left behind like that, sort of replaced or pushed aside. I loved it, seeing her with him, but felt left out and that was rough.



    You are right in your last line too: it would have been much better if we had continued to share Julie.

    Feb 27, 2011
    1 like
  • LonelyX3

    ********** are different for everyone. Some are as Willboo stated he preferred yet some are more of a bonding between the couple with the addition as a toy... It's suppose to be a *********... not a twosome. A real ********* all three participate... sounds like Julie got caught up in him and he loved that she did. He had his wife but enjoyed everything he wanted with your girlfriend anytime he wanted. From what you've said I doubt she could resist him but knew she couldn't have him only enjoy him and she did so at every opportunity.



    She may be afraid of her feelings and how she lost control of them before. Some couples find it more appealing to only do it a couple of times a year with different men without the chance of an intimate connection forming only great sex that you both have discussed and know what is desired before hand. Most couples who do this end up having awesome sex together after the addition has left as they discuss it and connect in it, but what you shared before seems to have been moreso lovers than players and if she would sneek out to **** him then you weren't connecting with her in it at all. Sounds like it was more what Dave wanted than what you wanted. Next time make sure it's understood that you share in all of it

    Feb 26, 2011
    2 likes
  • Willboo

    I don't know about your guys but I want my wife to love her lover to death, give her self to the fullest and enjoy his **** when ever she so desires! If you think your wife is going to **** a guy on a regular bases and not fall in love with him your nuts! At times she is going to want his **** more often then yours! Isn't that what you wanted in the first place for her to enjoy ******* another guy! Well feeling goes along with ******* in some cases! Believe it or not there are guys out there that can satisfy a woman more then you can, even your woman! My wife has the freedom to do as she pleases after all I'm the one who asked her to take on a lover!

    Nov 17, 2010
    1 like
    • ladyblue848

      A wife wanting another man's **** more than yours is not love. Trust me I have been there. She just wants sex with him more. Wanting to do more with the other guy than just have sex with him is often evidence of love. If you truly want your wife to love her lover to death, you are putting your marriage at serious risk. If she falls for him hard and thinks her life would be better with him, you are history my friend.

      Sep 27, 2011
      1 like
    • Maxnoir

      agreed

      Oct 22, 2011
      1 like
  • Willboo

    I don't know about your guys but I want my wife to love her lover to death, give her self to the fullest and enjoy his **** when ever she so desires! If you think your wife is going to **** a guy on a regular bases and not fall in love with him your nuts! At times she is going to want his **** more often then yours! Isn't that what you wanted in the first place for her to enjoy ******* another guy! Well feeling goes along with ******* in some cases! Believe it or not there are guys out there that can satisfy a woman more then you can, even your woman! My wife has the freedom to do as she pleases after all I'm the one who asked her to take on a lover!

    Nov 17, 2010
    2 likes
  • ward

    shootermcgavin69,


    Yeah, I did that too, numerous times. This is only one of my true posted anecdotes. Some others at these URLs:


    http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e... />
    http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e... />
    http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e... />
    http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e...
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    Many other anecdotes posted here on EP. We had some great times in those days!

    Feb 5, 2009
    2 likes
  • shootermcgavin69

    It's a great story but i'ts only a story. You need to be a real man and actually watch her get ******.

    Feb 5, 2009
    1 like
    • ward

      It is a story about a real event.

      Jun 14, 2012
      1 like
  • ward

    Glad to hear you liked that story I posted sedonan, it still makes me feel kind of warm too.



    The first part of this story, the one where Dave took Julie in his room right after the shower, still turns me on a lot; I can still remember lusting after her when I saw her all clean and naked and still damp after she showered with him. I wanted her so damned badly but couldn't get at her because Dave

    was in between her legs. Ooh, those naked thighs, I can still remember how nice they looked.



    The best outcome since they had gone this far already, would have been for me to calmly go to my room and wait. Wait for Dave to get his rocks off, spray his come into her ***** or in her mouth, or wherever he felt like. Then Julie would have to come to my room and I really would have enjoyed that! Oh yes, why didn't I think of it then?



    I like to think of her coming down the stairs and into my room, a little nervous maybe, but freshly ****** and still horny. I could have hugged her and kissed her and asked her to tell me what Dave and her had done. Where did he ***? Did she suck his **** in the shower? No, she'd done it when they got in his room.



    She could have really turned me on telling me about the whole thing; I would have been wild, eating her ***** while she described it all. Gosh, that would have been great! I'd like to have her tell me about it now, even if she couldn't remember much about it, she could make it up and I'd still love it.

    Jun 14, 2012
    2 likes
  • sedonan

    TURNED ME ON BIG TIME.RIGHT-ON THANKS

    Sep 2, 2007
    1 like
  • ward

    Julie to this day insists that she participated in our summer-long ********* only because it got ME excited. The parts I've written about on this site tell an entirely different story. When she went over to his house that one Saturday when Dave's wife was supposed to be out of town with the kids I didn't know anything about her plans, did not even know Dave was going to be alone for the weekend. If his wife and kids actually had been out of town I think Julie would have told me about going over to Dave's and ******* his socks off, but I am not real sure. There were several other events that showed me she was into the extra-relational sex a lot. She loved sucking his ****, no doubt about it. What's the big deal? Why won't she just admit it? Maybe because then I would have ammunition to use trying to talk her into having another *********, which, as we are now married, would be too far out of line.



    Women sure are hard to read sometimes. Is that your experience guys?

    Jan 22, 2007
    1 like
    • ladyblue848

      Perhaps its because she doesn't want to admit to you, or herself, that she was actually doing what I mentioned above. There may have been a hidden agenda that she knows may not sit well with you.

      Sep 27, 2011
      1 like
    • Maxnoir

      you're just too smart in my books! really just kidding and admiring

      max

      Oct 22, 2011
      1 like
    • ward

      Yep, you could be right. Too bad people can't be more transparent sometimes; it would have been helpful to discuss things with her more openly back then; hell, it be nice to do that now!

      Jun 14, 2012
      1 like
  • SINISTERMEMPHISTO

    I WOULD LIKE TO TRY A ********* BUT I REALLY DONT KNOW HOW MY MARRIAGE WOULD BE AFFECTED.IM SCARED SHE WOULD DO WHAT YOUR FIANCE DID

    Jan 4, 2007
    1 like
  • ward

    Yes, you are right Kelly. I lost control of the situation. The attraction between those two was very strong. I'm not sure I felt humiliation, but I can see how you might pick that up; it was the loss of control that was disturbing.



    When we started out, the three of us, everything was pre-arranged, time and place and also sort of, what exactly would happen. I did not foresee that Julie would love sucking the other guy's **** so much, but that was exciting too.



    The difficult part was when it seemed I was missing time with Julie while she was busy blowing Dave. I hadn't arranged it; she would suck his **** whenever he walked in the room, dropping to her knees between his legs right away, so control was in Dave and Julie's "hands." It looks like part of the thrill for me was controlling Julie's sexuality, which men have been doing to women for hundreds of thousands of years, right? Losing control took some of the fun away, but that was thrilling in a way too; part of the problem was Dave: he made it clear he did not want me to participate while he had his **** inside Julie. I don't think Julie could control herself either and perhaps that scares her, makes her hesitate to redo the *********.



    Thanks for your reply KellyJ!

    Jan 4, 2007
    2 likes
    • ladyblue848

      Lots of men like the sexual control, and even though they may not realize it, we women usually know it. Sometimes the women don't like the level of control the men are exerting so they will find extreme ways to rebel and take the control away from them, and make it clear to them that that is what has happened. Sometimes I don't even think they do it consciously, but other times I know they do, because women in the lifestyle have told me about doing it. It seems like the worst way to take away the control is not for the woman to take it, but for her to give it to another man. Then they often find an obvious way to let their partner know that is what has happened by finding a way to rub it in his face.

      Sep 27, 2011
      1 like
    • ward

      You have some good insights there lb848. It sure did feel like that, that she was giving control to him. Hee hee, it was painful but pleasurable too.

      Jun 14, 2012
      1 like
  • KellyJ

    Its almost as if you like the humiliation of a man taking your wife and you being helpless? Sorry, no offence intended. I would lve to be able to have both, but would alos need to know my partner was truly happy, sounds like sometimes you really were not.

    Jan 3, 2007
    3 likes