Despite my pretense at total rationality, I have a primitive core that runs deep in my nature. For example: I had a terrible nightmare years ago.  The devil offered me a huge lottery winning in exchange for an unspeakable price.  In the light of day, my inner gypsy rang a clarion call.  No Way Jose!  No Jungian Lucifer, lurking in the brain stem that I inherited from the ancients, was going to collect on a bargain that I remember refusing in my nightmare but might have unconciously made anyway by dreaming the damn dream in the first place.  That's some real sick reasoning right there. Believe me, I know how absurd it is.  But, just in case, I have not bought a lottery ticket since.  My husband knows about my convictions against the lottery but I haven't told him exactly why I feel this way.  I know he buys tickets sometimes and hides them from me. I can't blame him for that. He's his own man.   But what a totally new day a winning ticket will bring him! He'll gain both a fortune and marital freedom, cause I'll be bookin it outta here. 

LilAnnie LilAnnie
56-60, F
6 Responses Aug 11, 2008

No, no. I'm sorry. I felt over my head on the subject, to be honest about it. I am a coward. You are a very learned man about this. And I have no formal education. What more could I contribute that you don't already know? Pretty much nothing.<br />
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There is this. About singing and music. Just from a personal perspective. I don't like to think of my physical, mental or emotional responses as being programmed in any mechanical cause and effect way but I know that it is the case anyway. Whether I like it or not. For example: my response to a huge crutch for me. Other stuff too but mostly music. I'd rather just enjoy it and not realize how exactly its "charms to soothe" are working their "magic". In my case, behavoral ignorance is bliss cause I like to imagine mysterious musical powers! Like music having the capacity to dance in between the filaments of the many threads in the la<x>yered fabric of existence! Oh yes. I like to think that's why I respond to it!!!

I've given up on talking myself out of my superstitious quirks. I'm too old and set in my ways now so why bother? The little myths and rituals I observe are very few and very silly and very specific. For that reason I don't worry about OCD. I know its not a mental illness, its the influence of centuries of the Roman Catholic Church where the existence of the supernatural is not in doubt.

Irreconcilable superstitions? Insanity?

Interesting grounds for divorce.

; )

Come closer. Give me your ear. <br />
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Shhhh! "Somebody" (looks over shoulder, makes the Sign of the Cross) might hear us! (whispers: If you think you are understanding what I meant when I said what you think you might have heard if you could? Enough said about that the better!)