my oldest daughter is 22 yrs old. she went thru a bad marriage moved home about a yr, in a half ago. she recently found a place of her own, so she can begin the hard struggle of getting full custody of her kids. i would do anything in this world 4 my children n grandkids. my oldest daughter has always been a bit lazy. lol. i cook 4 her, clean - up after her, like when she always leaves her dirty wash on the bathroom floor. dirty dishes on my coffee table. i know i should not do all the things i do 4 her. but she is my baby. even when she was married i went to her place everyday, n i cleaned 4 her, did her wash, cooked meals 4 her. i know many people say am n enabler, because i dont make her do these things 4 herself, but am her mother, i have always done everything i could 4 her. i raise my other 2 children to be more independent, because i know in my heart i should not do all these things 4 her. but i know i wont stop. today am going to her new place to clean n start to unpack her stuff. of course i first have to pick -up her dirty wash of the bathroom floor n do her dishes. yea, it gets to me a bit at times, but in a way it makes me feel needed. she will always n  4 ever be my baby girl. i know she can n should do these things 4 herself but am her mother, n 4 as long as she needs me to i will do all this n everything else i can 4 her.

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1 Response Feb 17, 2010

i think youre doing what you feel best to do as a mother. and dont let it get to you, remember its your choice. and my mothers the same way with me i was spoiled rotten, so now as an 18 yr old i am quite lazy and dont pick up much of my stuff unless im screamed at, so id say let her learn for her own growth, she has potential and the brain to do some things her self, i think its awful sweet of u to help her, but give her some time to gather the want and motivation to do it herself. i love your honesty, thank u for sharing.