I Have the Same Thoughts!!

I have been so horrible in the past as this usually ends up about men!

Like when my best friend (then not any more! my fault) was parading her guy about in front of me! i had heard her tell me every day how much she loved him and he was her one and only etc but he only wanted her as a friend or a **** buddy!!!

I saw him and thought how come i cant get a guy that good looking the real green eyes came out! but then he started to flirt with me so i carried it on!!!

In the end i asked him what his situation with him and her! He told me she was like some sort of stalker and only had sex with her because he felt sorry for her!
He then asked me if i wanted to risk everything and have sex with him!!
I told him i wanted to ***** him and shag him on the table the second i saw him but i was just being polite that i didn't!!!

So after my friend had gone to bed we had sex in the room next door!! i enjoyed it so much more than usual sex as there was the risk factor to it and that was her walking in at anytime!!!

But after that amazing night i couldn't keep it a secret i felt so bad! i told her the bight we were supposed to be going out and she hated me but still came to pick me up and took me out! she wanted to know everything and wanted to know why i didn't tell her earlier!!

As you might of already guessed that was the end of my friendship with her and thinking back i often wonder why as it was only good because of the huge risk i was taking and i have wrecked a brilliant friendship and broke her heart in the process!!!

I met up with the guy a year later and asked how she was and she seemed to forgiven him the and now back friends with him!! but not me but i cant blame her I'm a *****!!! But that was 4 years ago now so anything could of happened and i think about her all the time hoping she is okay and that she has found her perfect job, fella, kids etc but ill just never know!
sazead sazead
22-25, F
Mar 26, 2007