Anything About Me

I almost committed suicide when my second husband left me. I took a lot of pills, telling myself I just wanted to sleep...and ended up sleeping for the night and most of the next day.  I did not know why I lived, but then my Grandfather got really sick right after that and he actually died twice, and I realized that if I had died he would have too. I truly believe that he lived for my Mom and I. If I had died, he would have too, and then so would Mom, and I am not sure my step-dad or brother would have survived all that.

I have had my Grandfather a whole extra yearand vice versa. We see eachother at least once a week and I am so very grateful each and every time.

No one knows that I did that, and I will never tell them. I had a cousin and an uncle that both did commit suicide, and even knowing what that did to my family, I tried...I feel very bad that I did that. I always thought I was stronger than that, but everything piled up and I got weak. I realize that he was no where near worth what I almost gave up for/because of him. He would not have even noticed except for a minute maybe. The ones I would have hurt were my family and a couple friends. Things have been hard, but I am making it and it is getting better...and he proves more and more that he is not worth anyones life, especially mine.

ThankYouSir ThankYouSir
41-45, F
Feb 28, 2009