Dearest Self,

I pray life has found you in the best of health.  I admire your stregnth and determination.  I remember watching you in the mirror at aerobics classes.  It was a struggle and you were unsure but you stuck in there and did in fact get rid of the unnecessary belly and are rocking a fantastic abs.   I'm not exactly there yet. But I'm definately seeing the outline of my pecks. You didn't know it then but I was falling in love with you.  I wanted you to look and feel great!

I know there was a span of years that I pretended not to know you. I did in fact remember who you are but the memory was faint. I was far to busy loving someone else to notice how much I was hurting you.  I can't even say that person loved me back. Wish they would have. 

Non-the less, I don't regret you distancing yourself from me and I should have known better.  You've always been there for me.  When I struggled, as I triumphed, even the lazy days when I did absolutely nothing but surf the net and watch those boring sci-fi shows.   You didn't mind sticking around to keep me company, celebrate with me and my friends or cry with me.  Boy did we have fun!

Its ironic how other people saw more in you than I did at times.  I'm grateful for those people as well.  There were some who encouraged you while I filled your mind with doubt and ignored your desire to be more than you were.  If I had only known then what I know now.  I would have being more loving, kinder and patient.  I would have spoiled you with the things you like.  I would have worked harder to please you. 

All in all, I'm grateful that you finally noticed me and want to thank you for loving me.

P.S. I heard about your Son and his brain legion.  I'm happy to hear he has miraculously healed and is back to his healthy self.  If you ever need me I won't let you down again.




ichooselife ichooselife
36-40, F
2 Responses Mar 15, 2009

thank you.

wow this letter is so touching.<br />
you said it so right about pretending not to know our true self.i feel the same.each sentence just got to my heart<br />
good luck and all the best to you :)