I know that I've been a disappointment to you. I know that you would have probably perferred a boy, and instead you got stuck with me. I wish I could have shown you how much more I could be. I learned to play baseball for you, hoping maybe you'd come to see a game. I learned to enjoy football, but you never noticed me when it was on. What weekends we spent together, you never did anything with me. You fed me well, and you had somewhere for me to sleep, but you weren't there. It was hard trying to figure out why you didn't want to be with me. Why did you only want to sit and talk with your nieces and nephews at Christmas? Why was your daughter pushed to the side? You never saw me either, but it didn't matter to you, did it?
I wish I could hate you. Instead I fell for a man exactly like you. Uncaring, sarcastic, couldn't be bothered to remember anniversaries, birthdays, or even Christmas.... I think you would have liked him Daddy, if you had ever bothered to show up to see me. I believe you two probably would have got along real well. He's gone now daddy, he left, just like you did. Now, I'm alone, again. Can you tell me what it is that you don't like? What is it about me that makes you turn away? Am I really that bad? What? I wish you could tell me, that way maybe I could change. I'm good at adapting daddy, you just have to tell me what you want. I can try to become whatever or whoever you want me to be. I'd try really hard daddy, please, won't you tell me what I have to do to make you love me........Please daddy. I really need you to love me.
All my love,
~ WynHaven ~