Total Stranger

I THINK YOU DID THE RIGHT THING GOOD FOR U AND DON'T FEEL GUILY I KICKED HIS *** OUT AND BELIEVE ME IT IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE FOR ME AND MY 2 BOYS. STAY STRONG

Hi sandylo, thanks for sharing your story. You are a brave woman, and you have taken the right step in removing the threat of violence from your home. Your focus on your two "Angels" is also a correct response.
As a single dad with a heroin-addicted ex wife, I know a little of your experience. I hope you are not offended if I suggest that you do try to give your boys some kind of regular quality access to their father, even if it is under the supervision of a third party adult. Boys do need their dads' love just as much as their mothers'.

Thanks for ur comments....although I'm trying to stay strong and move on and heal...it's hard..brutal at times!!! But the people that matter most are here w me and it's up to me to keep them safe.
I know they need their father, but they also need someone that will be agood example and healthy; he is not there yet. He was abussive at timeswith them and they dont want to b around him.
There is nothing for me to do, just stand still and let God and life lead the way. I don't trust him alone with the boys and it's up to the judge to deside wether he is a fit parent or not.
So.....life goes on.....

I think you established some healthy new boundaries and made great steps to get out of that cycle of co-dependancy. The kids don't need an addicted abusive guy in their life and neither do you. There is No room for guilt on your part. You didn't cause any of these problems. Guilt is a part of the cycle of co-dependancy so throw it away. So now is the time to draw new boundaries, set knew goals, keep dreams alive.....and maybe, there is something you can do other than just ...wait. I'm "stuck in stuck" too lately. I'm trying to be "patient" and trying wait for God to lead the way but in the meantime sometimes we can do something that at least moves us in the right direction. By the way, I think you are a far better judge as to the fitness of the father than the judge. You know the thruth and more and more of the truth as you get free from the lies of co-dependancy so don't be afraid to act on those truths. The hardest thing for all of us is finding people that really understand whom we can talk to and trust and not be judged, etc. We all need that and it's not easy to find. Hang in there.