I Was Only One.

I was one year old the last time I seen my father. He left my mother and never even tried to be a part of my life. I do not rememeber him. I only know he truly existed because I have a picture of him holding me when I was a baby. It was so hard for me to grow up without my father. Most people do not realize that a father daughter relationship is so important. Unfortuantely I did not have one. The worse part is my mother never found anyone else so all I truly have is my mother. I wish I had a decent step dad or just someone to fill the role of my father, but no. My father did not want me. I was not good enough for him, and that is something I must live with for the rest of my life. It honestly affects me in everything I do. I find it very hard to trust people and I have this intense rage. I just wish I could have one day with my father so I could tell him how I feel. It really is so hard.
LindsayKY LindsayKY
1 Response Feb 8, 2011

I'm deeply sorry you feel that way, you are not to blame. The fact that he left you both was his choice and maybe you'll never be able to know why. However, I think you should try focusing on the positive things you have in your life, which I'm sure you do. Try to learn from it in order to make you a more experienced, mature, careful person...it's the only thing you can do. It is his loss, not yours, because to have a father like that, well...you're better off without him. My father is an ******* and I've wanted him to die so many times...so in my case, I wish I was you and my father had left me us in peace. You see, nobody has a perfect story, but we have to try to take the best from every situation in order to grow. Your father is a ****, but you've got the chance not to be one, so focus on that.