Parents Always Put Their Children First... Not My Dad.

Thank you rockchick1681. I read your story also, I am sorry you are going through that. I feel bad for complaining sometimes when I read others stories because there is always somone who had/has it worse. In my case, at least the physical abuse stopped after she was caught.I had a home,clothes and food to eat. But the control issues were just as bad. I never had to do chores like you describe because my mother was such a control freak, if she saw I did not do it the way she wanted it done I would get yelled at and made to feel stupid for "not doing it right" I have more negative memories than positive of my mother. Today, I have cut her out of my life because I do not want her to have a negative impact on my marrige or children. The down side of this is my father has chosen to side with her and has said he will not talk/or contact me ever again unless I have a change of heart about letting the kids see my mother. So, even though my parents are alive, it is though they are dead to me, my father by his own choice. It really hurts and if anything ever happened to my husband I would be alone in this world(only child/no other relatives,my childen are small). What I really want to tell you is as hard as it may seem you have to soldier through those tough times, don't let their actions have a negative impact on yourself, if you cut yourself the only person you are hurting is you.

Also, Please don't turn to drugs or alcohol as an "escape", you will only ruin your own life or even worse turn out like the ones who cause you pain. You have to look towards the future and think of ways and act in ways that better yourself so you can rise above.Choose your freinds carefully, a girl like you who is going through things like this can be vulnerable to bad influence. You must stay determined to be the opposite of those who hurt you. Only you can make your future better.Choices you make now will affect your future.

Even though I had a tough childhood, I have never used it as an excuse for bad behavior, I treat others the way I want to be treated, I try to show only kindness to other people(I know people/my mother included who say "I was beated as a child, so thats what I learned, thats BS!) I have a college education, a good career until I resigned to stay at home with kids, a happy marrige for 13 yrs and wonderful children. Also, always be independant, have a back up plan. Its tough to think about, but if something happened to my husband, I could be independant thanks to having a college education/career to fall back on. Now, emotionally if that happened, I would fall apart! He is my rock, we had similar childhoods(his was actually a lot worse) so we understand each other.He also is a good example of not letting childhood expereince impact your life negatively, he has been independant and had a job since 15, he now has his own business and is he best dad/husband ever! If we can perservere out of the crap we have been through, I know you can. I know your life seems tough now, but let me tell you you life really won't begin until after HS. Until then, use EP as support, read others stories, because like I said their are others who have it worse. Their stories will keep you from feeling sorry for yourself and give you strength. Find a local support group to go to, talk to someone you can trust or a counseler (at school maybe?) when you are feeling down. Just don't keep your feelings bottled up, and not to be corny(remember I am over 30).... Stay in school, get an education, stay away from drugs and alcohol and people who do. Stay strong my young freind.