It's My Birthday...

Today is my birthday. I have never really thought about this before, but I wonder if my birthmother thinks about me.. I wonder if she remembers that 16 years ago she left her child in somebody elses hands. I wonder if she remembers me. Or thinks about me as much as I think about her. I officially hate this day.It's making me think about her.. I don't want to think about her. She gave me away and kept her other three kids. How could she do that? Hhhh... I'm tired of living like this. Missing her. Thinking about her day after day. I might not even cross her mind. She probably doesn't think of me, or remember that today was the day I was born. This sucks. :/
TeenageDreamer32 TeenageDreamer32
18-21, F
2 Responses May 24, 2012

It's my birthday today. And I wonder the very same thing. Nineteen years ago, my life changed forever. A woman I never knew, and in all probability will never know, abandoned me. I hate this. You know what's the worst thing? Not, not knowing who I am, not the crushing sense of rejection, but knowing deep down that even if I did have all my answers answered, it wouldn't change a thing, I would still be this splintered inside.

Not a birthday goes by that I don't have those same thoughts! My ten cents: I don't think it is possible NOT to think about us on our birthdays. No matter how you look at it, that day marked all of our hearts one way or another. Whether she looks at this day with regret, anger, disappointment, etc. remains to be seen....but she is thinking about you. Congrats on your birthday-celebrate yourself!