I Was An Abused Spouse
On September 24, 2000, my best friend was shot dead by her husband. She suffered abuse at his hands for years, before he finally finished it with a point blank blast from a 12 guage shotgun. Go ahead and look it up. Her name was Patti Jean Nickerson
Manning and she was killed in Palmer, Michigan by her husband, Donald Scott Manning. He was convicted of second degree murder and received a 20 yr to 50 yr sentence. He's eligible for parole in 2020....
Patti was my friend for most of my life and somebody I would have gladly laid my life down for. Unfortunately, I never got the chance. When her husband first started abusing her, it was shoving, grabbing, head locks, and yelling. I told her she needed to leave him, that it would escalate. She could leave him for short spells, but always went back.
About a year before her death, I went out to my camp and found a tent pitched on the bank of the river. I wandered down to politely tell the squatter they were on private property. When Patti stepped out of the tent, I didn't recognize her. Her face and head were swelled up to at least twice the normal size and she was barely able to talk. I cried like a baby as I carried her inside, set her on the couch, and started to clean her up and dress her wounds. It was appalling...
She was probably concused and I begged her to let me take her to the hospital, but she would not allow it. I lay down next to her and softly rubbed her head. To my horror, I realized her husband had been punching her on top of the head, so it wouldn't leave a mark. Her head was covered in bumps and knots fromthe dozens of blows he landed before he finally gave up all restraint and pounded her mercilessly. I wish I had killed him for it. She would still be with me at least.
After a week of healing at my camp, I went to visit her and she was gone. I called her and she had decided to go back home. I told her he was capable of anything and to please leave him. I would gladly take care of her and her children. She didn't listen. There was nothing else I could do. A year later, I got a call that she was dead. She had her stuff packed and her cell phone in her hand at the front door. Her husband shot her in the chest from a distance of less than 4 feet with a 12 guage shotgun. She died instantly. He left her there for another 6-8 hours while he sat down and drank, finally calling 911 to report an accidental shooting.
Please listen to me. If a man is abusing you, he is capable of anything. He has no boundries. It won't stop and it won't get better. The problem is him. It is not you. Leave him immediately. If you have no means of escape, call anyone. Don't worry about anything other than yourself and your children and leave. There are people and organizations that will provide a safe place for you for as long as it is needed. Look up the Barbara Kettle Gundlach shelter. It is an anonymous, fully funded abuse center that will hide you and your children and provide protection for you. They will get you airfare or transportation, whatever you need. Think seriously about what I say. My friend is dead due to her and my inaction. DO NOT MAKE THE MISTAKE WE MADE!
Manning and she was killed in Palmer, Michigan by her husband, Donald Scott Manning. He was convicted of second degree murder and received a 20 yr to 50 yr sentence. He's eligible for parole in 2020....
Patti was my friend for most of my life and somebody I would have gladly laid my life down for. Unfortunately, I never got the chance. When her husband first started abusing her, it was shoving, grabbing, head locks, and yelling. I told her she needed to leave him, that it would escalate. She could leave him for short spells, but always went back.
About a year before her death, I went out to my camp and found a tent pitched on the bank of the river. I wandered down to politely tell the squatter they were on private property. When Patti stepped out of the tent, I didn't recognize her. Her face and head were swelled up to at least twice the normal size and she was barely able to talk. I cried like a baby as I carried her inside, set her on the couch, and started to clean her up and dress her wounds. It was appalling...
She was probably concused and I begged her to let me take her to the hospital, but she would not allow it. I lay down next to her and softly rubbed her head. To my horror, I realized her husband had been punching her on top of the head, so it wouldn't leave a mark. Her head was covered in bumps and knots fromthe dozens of blows he landed before he finally gave up all restraint and pounded her mercilessly. I wish I had killed him for it. She would still be with me at least.
After a week of healing at my camp, I went to visit her and she was gone. I called her and she had decided to go back home. I told her he was capable of anything and to please leave him. I would gladly take care of her and her children. She didn't listen. There was nothing else I could do. A year later, I got a call that she was dead. She had her stuff packed and her cell phone in her hand at the front door. Her husband shot her in the chest from a distance of less than 4 feet with a 12 guage shotgun. She died instantly. He left her there for another 6-8 hours while he sat down and drank, finally calling 911 to report an accidental shooting.
Please listen to me. If a man is abusing you, he is capable of anything. He has no boundries. It won't stop and it won't get better. The problem is him. It is not you. Leave him immediately. If you have no means of escape, call anyone. Don't worry about anything other than yourself and your children and leave. There are people and organizations that will provide a safe place for you for as long as it is needed. Look up the Barbara Kettle Gundlach shelter. It is an anonymous, fully funded abuse center that will hide you and your children and provide protection for you. They will get you airfare or transportation, whatever you need. Think seriously about what I say. My friend is dead due to her and my inaction. DO NOT MAKE THE MISTAKE WE MADE!
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