My Brother and I Had Our Heads Banged Together

It was actually a favourite punishment of my Father's.

He would grab us by the ear or hair or usually both. Then he would knock our skulls together as hard as he dared.

If we cried then he would give us something to really cry about, he'd let us know if we started crying it would get worse, and we couldn't stop ourselves from crying. Especially me, being the youngest. I think my brother was taught to blame me because my crying made him get punished more so he hated me too. It wasn't his fault it was all my dad. I hate him so much. I will never forgive. I can't heal myself while I  hold all this hate inside me, but I don't know what to do with it.

When I was older, afterwe gort a house again when  ws nine, and had my own bedroom, he would throw me across it, and keep me shut in, he never locked me in , but there was no way I was going to try to defy him. I had to accept what ever he would do without making a noise or he would hurt me more. He used a stick on me and a belt and his shoe. Mainly though, the would just hit us all on the back or side of the head, using the heel of his hand. He'd do it all the time... I became really 'flinchy'.

My father was a big guy. He looked very scary to me. I look like him now. I hate looking in the mirror and seeing him.

My father used to hit us on the back of the head with the heel of his hand. All the f***ing time. Whenever I had to walk past him I would flinch. He made sure I had to walk past him as much as possible, just so he could make me flinch. He would stand right in the doorway and tell me to go to my room, and I would have to walk so close to him I would flinch so badly I was like a cowering dog.

When my father got home from work, we would all try to look busy. Often my brother and I would fight over which of us could lock himself in the bathroom and pretend to be using the loo, to avoid being the first one he saw when he got home. the first to be seen usually ended-up getting the worst of the anger he'd been bottling-up at work all day. He hated his boss.

My life ruined, up until now, cuz the guy couldn't be bothered, just couldn't be f'ing bothered to deal with his anger/P.A. issues.

demonizd demonizd
31-35, M
10 Responses Feb 14, 2009

I feel bad for you and wish the best for you.

My dad did this to my sister and me -- banged our heads together. I had never heard of this happening to other people before I read this. I too remember that hurt deep inside my brain. My younger sister seems like she might have gotten some brain damage from it.

My dad would go into a rage about the simplest things -- he would throw us across the room and kick us until we peed in our pants. All 5 of us ended up with emotional problems.

I am still working on trying to forgive the sick bastard.

I understand this more than I would like to admit. I can not even try and count the number of times my father did this to my older brother and me. He would make us stand in front of him and yell at us and then do this. I can still remember the jarring feeling and the metal like taste I would get and the way it would hurt both on the side we had our heads smacked together on and on the other side where my head would throb. Then the other thing that was the same was as we would cry we would hear the words "shut-up and stop crying now, or I'll really give you something to cry about".

Fortunately somewhere between when he did this with us and when my younger siblings grew up ten years later he stopped this. But I really can't help wondering is the migraines I have now have any relation to these actions from way back then.

It was my mom that knocked me and my brother's heads only happened once, we learned our lesson. Anyone here ever had a mom do that instead of a dad?

My mum did it to me and ny other 2 siblings who ever was in the middle was the most unlucky one

I'm so sorry this happened to you. It's familiar to me, my father used to knock our heads together too, but he wasn't as brutal as your Dad. It's not your fault. You can heal yourself and move on.

This story is chillingly similar to my childhood. My brother and I were never forced to hit heads but our dad would hit us in the head (like you said, with the heel of his hand) and tell us if we cried, he'd give us something to cry about. Only I was the oldest and my brother the youngest. He got it worse because my dad thought my brother was a "man" (he was only a boy) and should be able to take more and my brother was unable to control his crying. I got really good at not crying when he got in our face and/or hit us, but it caused major emotional issues later in my past. I remember the rush to look busy when he came home. I would either clean my room furiously or hide in the closet, hoping my dad would think I was outside playing. To this day I still feel unnaturally safe in small spaces, if no one can see me.

you are unlucky to live life in fear this stuff happens...

wow i am stunned, i can't say i can't believe sombody could do that, coz i know they can. i am sorry for the pain you suffered and i hope healing is swift :)

i'm crying. i'm sitting at my desk at work and crying.

Thankyou. I am on the mend now, thanks to everyone I have met though EP and all the comments you leave me.:) <br />
I am blessed to have found this place.

I can't imagine the horror you went through, it sickens me to hear of kids being treated this way by some monster control freak. I hope you will be able to heal from this.