Confusion.I always find myself lost and dropped from society, like all my friends aren't who they used to be.
I don't know whether it's just me or they're actually changing and not being as good of friends as they used to be.
Crushs just keep drifting and seem more complicating, Justin, I've dated him once before about a year and a half ago nearly when we first met.
He acts like he likes me now, but still picks on me, not rudely like his friends do, but he does. Then at other times, he'll flirt with me, like I do with him.
It's weird, I've never been so nervous to look at a guy, I've never been so scared of losing friends, my family is already gone. I live with my grandparents, and I'm made fun of because my two little brothers drowned when I was 9, they were 6 and 7. It was a rough week. Losing one on the spot and the other acouple days after.
I don't know who to trust anymore, my mother 'fighting' to get my sister and I in court, when all she does is lie on me and get me in trouble.
I've always had trust issues, but now they've gotten even worse.
I'm always shaking now, I just hold out my hand and it's trembling mildly. I'm always nervous, in school when an announcement is made I'm afraid my name will be called, I'm afraid I'll be sent to the Office to do something or I'm in trouble, I'm always nervous for it.
I've been really anxious lately, waiting for school to end and so I can get away from all them people. But I still want to see one of my crushes. I only have two. Ben and Justin. I never really liked anybody until last July when I seen Ben, only had to look at him.
But does anybody have a clue onto why I'm always shaky, and jumpy.?