My Parents Were Nuts!

I think the first time that my Parents embarrassed me was when we lived in Alaska. It had just become a state and we were living on a sparcely populated street which eventually grew to capacity.  My brand new elementary school had just been built across the street.  Probably saved my life a time or two when the class bully had me pinned a couple of times.  My Mom would come out of the house yelling at them to let me go.

My Dad built us the most incredibly designed home with cutting edge quality.  By far the nicest house on the block. After the big earthquake in 1964 we were the only house on our street to have our kitchen in tact because of the "push door" cabinets that stayed closed. We had a family room the size of the apartment Dad built below it. A fireplace built with fossil rock., and many more great ideas. So then they decided to pick out paint colors for the exterior.  "Why yes, lets paint it pink!" Now to choose a color for the family room carpet.  Hmmm, yes, the bright red thank you.  And instead of a recliner my Dad decided he would rather have a lawn chair chaise next to the new couches Mom bought.  All other carpets had to be gold along with the drapery to reflect Alaskan heritage. Then Mom had her GENIUS moment.  She collected several large rocks and painted them Krylon GOLD for our front yard!  Big Alaskan Gold nuggets in front of a pink house. We literally "glowed" against the bright white snow. 

Another time that I thought I would not survive the embarrassement when I was about 16.  We lived in a town of 600 people.  An old fashioned grocery/mail window and volunteer Fire Dept.  We are living about 50 feet from each neighbor in a 10 house subdivision in our part of town.  The Warrens lived on our right.  These are nice homes about 20 years old with well manicured yards and a lot of pride went into each homes curb appeal.  So Mom and Dad decided to go "Car shopping".  They loved trading in their vehicles at least once a year or whenever a really good deal came around.  So I'm thinking, "God I hope they don't bring home another brand new brown Dodge Dart.  I had announced to my friends at school one day how my Parents were buying a "NEW" car and they would be picking me up in it.  To my horror they pulled up in a brown Dodge Dart.  It may as well had "CAR" painted on the side. 

Anyway, at this particular time  I'm  Praying for another Mustang but with my folks, it was stricktly pot luck. Make and model had nothing to do with their choices.  They were literally blank slates when they left the house.

So I'm sitting in the living room with the big picture window.  I see the Warrens from next door pulling into our driveway.  This is odd, they only live 50 feet away.  I get a closer look and notice my Parents are driving the Warrens Red and White Ford Maverick.  But wait! The Warrens Maverick is in their driveway.  Then the truth slapped me upside the head.  My Parents had bought the identical car as the Warrens!!  A brightly painted red and white car. What the h***?  When I pressed them for an explanation of this well thought out purchase, they replied that it was a really nice car and they just had to have one like it.  Needless to say I was very uncomfortable at the bus stop in front of our house the next day. 

On another "car shopping expedition" they retrieved a dark green VW Fox Wagon.  They picked me up to go out for lunch since I was now living on my own. We arrived at the only restaraunt in town at lunchtime which is always busy and we know everyone.  Mom and Dad step out of the car and start walking in. I can't open my door so I check the door lock.  It's unlocked.  I keep trying it before I move over to the opposite door.  Same thing.  I realized I have been locked in the car!! They finally came back out and unlocked the door.  They were laughing as well as several other people.  My Parents got a car with "Child Locks" and wanted to see how they worked. 

I used to ask them if they had adopted me because they were bored and wanted someone to mess with.  My Dad would joke, "Yep, pretty much". God Love em but they really messed with my head sometimes.
Molly2350 Molly2350
51-55, F
May 15, 2012