I Was Left Behind

When I was 10yrs old I was dumped in an orphanage in western australia.My foster parents said they didnt want me anymore but thats another story.I came 2 South Australia 2 live with my uncles family.He had 7 kids already but he took me in out of duty he said.It was hard trying 2 fit in with a large family but I tried.My new mum was very strict and as i got older I saw how she treated me different 2 "her"girls.I wanted so much 2be loved so when I was 15 I left school 2 work simply because I mistakenly thought if I brang money in2 the household she would love me a little bit.Dont teenagers get the most foolish of ideas.It didnt work and I ended up moving out when I was 16.I worked 4 a while in a sewing factory until I met my future husband.After that I ended up pregnant and my parents were appalled.I went 2 a home 4 unmarried mothers run by the "sisters of st joseph".I knew this was the only way I would b able 2 eat healthy food as I was unemployed and had no money.I was finally going 2have my own family and I would of walked across burning coals if I had 2 for my baby girl.I knew the day I found out I was pregnant God would give me my baby girl.She was all I had ever wanted.It was the happiest moment of my life when the dr put her in my arms.I loved her with all my heart but her daddy didnt want her and i refused 2put her up for adoption.Over the years I had 3 baby boys who their daddy did want and another little girl who he didnt want.I never understood that?I loved them all unconditionally.They were my family.Somewhere along the line my parents decided they didnt want 2know me anymore.My mum rang me and told me  I was the black sheep of the family and it would be better off if i stopped contacting them.I had become used to rejection by then so I accepted what she asked.It was bad enough I grew up without parents who loved me now my kids had 2grow up without grandparents as well.I took it in stride and raised my family as best I could.Their dad came and went as he pleased.Being Catholic I did not believe in divorce so we didnt officially separate til 1989.Everybody I have known in my lifetime has moved on leaving me behind.Parents,friends etc.I have never understood this.I am a loyal person always trying 2plz but its never been good enough.I know it wasnt my real parents fault they died back in 1961 but it was certainly both sets of foster parents fault that they turned their backs on me.Why I ask constantly.Why?What did I do that was so wrong that someone could turn their back on a 10yr old and then later another set of parents turning on a 25yr old.All I eva wanted in my life was 2b loved and the only people who have been there 4me always are my children.My 1st foster mum constantly told me I had bad blood in me maybe she was right.I have no friends

kim111 kim111
6 Responses Jan 25, 2010

those people are dumb! you should not waste in time thinking about them... I love you!!!!

Good for you Like a fairy tail the girl gets the guy has a bunch of kids looses guy and life is not perfect for nobody.<br />
<br />
You have come a long way from being an abandon child.<br />
Did OK and if someone says that they rather not have communication with you no more.<br />
I think that's crazy on her part she does not know of what is going to be missed.<br />
Now when you get your annulment since the Catholic church does not recognise divorce.<br />
Find a man that will love all six of you.<br />
Ask the Lord to send you one that is right for you.

A lot of experiences, sad ones at that.<br />
But I admire the courage by which you took them on.<br />
<br />
Had it been me, I wouldn't be here to write this article even!<br />
<br />
Life is often compared to a candle.<br />
You keep burning and melting<br />
But then you give out light to others<br />
<br />
You have your children, boys & girls<br />
A successful life indeed !

I'm sure you've always felt like you were missing something in your life. I had an alcoholic mother and a father that practically donated his ***** and left the picture. I don't know which is worse not having parents at all or living with abuse - I suppose each of us has to go through something like this to really learn what life is about. I too adore my kids and spoil em' more than I should. But I will tell you that I feel the love that comes from my children and that I pour on to them is the BEST thing in life! Nothing like that type of unconditional love. I hope you contiue to cherish each moment and I'll do the same! Take care and thanks for posting.

thats so bad such a younge age iam sorry

Thanks SunnyMarie thats quite a compliment.I have always tried my best.Made a few mistakes on the way but always with my kids best interests at heart.If u dont have family u dont have anything cause friends come and go but family is 4ever.{When they really care}