I Was Molested

I was molested by a family member at the urging of a neighbor when I was about 5.  This family member wasn't much older, and I think of them as a survivor of molestation too.  I was molested until I was 10 or 11.  I did tell my mom at one point..she just acted like we were "playing doctor".  My parents knew the whole time.  This actually hurts more then anything else.  My older family member was in therapy at the time and told their therapist, who did not contact any kind of child welfare office.  Instead this Doctor (who was a family friend, apparently) told my parents, and assured them we wouldn't remember anything(we meaning my older sister and I).  I remember going to this Doctor's office and thinking it was my fault, and that I was in-trouble.  I remember telling a priest in confession..he told then third or fourth grader to stop having sex..(I honestly can't remember if we actually had sex; penetration) I remember everything so vividly.  I've been in therapy since I was about 15.  I tried to kill myself on my 21 birthday.  My sister said I should do everyone a favor and kill myself.  I obviously failed, . Since then I have done alot of work on me. 

I have been using some great work books if anyone would like the names of them.  For self-esteem and for sexual abuse.

Adlets Adlets
22-25, F
Feb 22, 2009