I made a horrible mistake I was a mistress to my 2nd cousin. I was 14 and he was 21 when he took my virginity. He was married to a woman with two children from a previous relationship. I felt horrible about myself for doing this. The affair went on for 4 years and I knew one day things would go wrong and sure enough his wife found his text messages. He denied ever having sex with me and told the whole family I started everything. I lost a best friend and trust from my family all because I didn't say "NO"
ksparkle ksparkle
18-21, F
1 Response Sep 17, 2012

Even if you did 'start everything' he was an adult, and you were a minor, he should've been the one saying no, and the fact that he wasn't and he 'let you do things with him' he's still at fault, and he could still be in a lot of trouble. If your age on here is correct which I don't know if it is, it says 13-15. But if the affair started at 14 and went on for four years you should be 18 at least? Anyways if you are under 18.. You could still press charges, and if he's ruined everything for you, I think you should. You don't deserve to have your family look down on you and he gets off scott free... You should do something about it.

Oh no I messed up on the age thing I'm 21 now. I should have pressed charges but I didn't half of the family were supporting him and not me I didn't know how to handle the situation because it got worse they were threatening to put in a mental hospital but I was 18.

Plus he had thrown all evidence away I thought it was useless to fight this and I know it would hurt my mother to know that there is nothing to do about it cause I waited too long to tell her. It is just a mess I don't want to hurt her feelings at the same time I want to tell her but I don't think she would believe me or think I was trying to get revenge.

Well it's been a few years since it's happened, it couldn't hurt to try. Be like I'm not trying to start anything and keep this to yourself, I just want you to know it wasn't all me, or me at all, it was him. And explain yourself. That's crap they took his side over yours, even if what he said was true, like I said you were a child, he should've known better.. Anyone can see that. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Thank you for listening I really appreciate the advice believe me I'm trying to tell her I just try to find the words to tell her. I have a family now and I try so hard not to think about the past but it's hard when I have to see him at family gatherings and in dreams.

Yeah, in order to get closure I'd tell your mom the truth, don't try to convince the whole family, just your mom, obviously us girls know mom's opinion is the most important!(; and then talk to him even, tell him how you feel, how wrong it was of him to put you in that situation when you were still a child.. see if he apologizes, it might make you feel better.

I will definitely try to talk to my mother but with I've already tried I called him for an apology and he didn't really apologize he was like I'm sorry for what ever I did to you. He wanted me to apologize to him while his wife was listening and that happened after the whole mess. I will try hard though to confront my mother.

Yeah your mom's approval is the most important, good luck!

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