When I Discovered Her Other Life

I knew things were wrong in our relationship, that she had stopped living with me, stopped showing up when she said she would, would tell me what I want to hear then not come through. Why she was being so flaky after years of being so in love, I had no idea. I suspected that she was pregnant with someone else's child, but she told me that wasn't true. A few months later she told me she was staying with her mom now, never came over, never invited me over... I figured she wanted out of the relationship but didn't have the guts to just say so. I was hurt and grieving but she kept promising me over and over that she wanted to work it out with me, she loved me. She started telling me all of these details of her plans to start our life together over.

I found out that she had been pregnant all along. When I was out of the country she gave birth to the baby, I never knew. When I got back she started coming around again, still wanting to work it out. She brought the baby, and said she was watching her cousin's child for some extra money. I thought she was serious, and considered working on it with her. Until the evening I found out that the baby was hers.

What terrible lies she told me! And her family, and the guy who got her pregnant. Looking back, she lied to me every day, all day, about where she was, what she was doing, everything. Lying had become her way of life. When I confronted her, saying I knew everything, she still lied about it... it took 10 minutes for her to say, yes, ok, the baby is mine, even when I already had the proof. She was addicted to lying. It was really sad.

I closed the door on her that day. I sold my huge engagement ring. I gave hers back. I never spoke to her again, except by email a few times. I took her phone off of my account. (She had another one, of course, which was a secret from me.) I try to move on in my life and carry the lessons I learned with me. I hope she finds a way to be a better person, for herself and her children.
ndrulz ndrulz
1 Response May 22, 2012

i think men have an easier time closing the door....I don't know why. maybe because women have so much empathy and compassion crammed into our head.<br />
<br />
compassion first for yourself, and then others. this is my new mantra