My Grandparents Are My 'real' Parents

My mother gave birth to me when she was 16 years old, she took care of me until I was about 6 months old, when she decided she could not give me the best care needed, the man who was my father stopped seeing me as she told him I was not his for some reason that is not clear. Her living situation was a violent one with drug addicts causing fights in and around the house. She gave me to her parents who had adopted her when she was seven years old. I was then adopted by them and my mother moved away getting married and shortly after having another baby, she had three more children after me who she looked after afew cities away from me. I stayed in contact with her and her new children and had a good relationship with my brothers and sisters.
 
However when I reached 17 I received a message from my mother saying that she had found my father. He started messaging me and we got to know each other that way. I had a dna test which came back positive proving he was my father. Within the two weeks this happened my mother left her new husband and moved in with my father lying to me about what she was doing and taking her daughter with her while her sons stayed with their father.
 
I still live with my grandparents who I look at as my parents, my mother has made many many mistakes with me but I feel this last one was too much. Not only has she destroyed the only trust I had in her but she broke up the rest of the family. It all happened very quickly and although ive been let down by my birth parents I deem my grand parents as how people put it, my real parents.
Slayer202 Slayer202
18-21, F
3 Responses Aug 10, 2010

Sla<x>yer202 and Strawberrypocky - I was really touched to read your stories. I was raised by my grandparents in the UK and am coming to the US as I want to try and find stories like yours - would either or both of you wish to message by Facebook or I could even phone? I am being sent by a charity and have a reference, this is a genuine project. No worries if you don't want to be involved, just glad you both have the support of your grandmothers, and wishing you both good lives, Leon

Strawberrypocky - The last comment you made about your father not contacting you, I think its good you dont dwell on it, I feel you are right about that and apart of me should take on your attitude as even now neither my mother or father really bother to contact me. I think perhaps Im better off without them as neither of them have caused me anything but problems.

I was partly raised by my grandmother...my mother and I lived with her until I was about 14 because my mother had no car and she could not afford to live in her own house all the time. Grandma adored me, but she really was awful to my mom, for some reason, and this made my mother develop a very short, explosive temper. Grandma also did not allow my mother to physically punish me when I misbehaved, which resulted in my mother screaming at me and my grandma a LOT. To this day, she is still the only person who can make me cry by screaming at me, and my mother has given me anxiety problems because she worries about everything and it has made me worry about everything.<br />
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I'm still afraid of her to an extent, to the point where, at the age of 23, I still need to ask her permission to do things. I don't trust her too much since she has violated my trust a few times.<br />
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My father was nowhere to be seen, as he left my mother when I was still an infant and he never spoke to me or contacted us. If he can't be bothered to talk to me, then I sure as hell don't need him in my life.