He Was 10 - I Was 9

He & his friends took me behind our elementary school. They knew exactly where the teachers patrolled. I was pushed down onto my hands & knees, & with his friends watching he raped me. 

To him it was just another way to humiliate & bully me. Every time he could get me alone on the playground or in the hallway, he'd do it again. I was so terrified of my own shadow from the years of bullying & abuse I had already taken, that I never told. 

To this day, that year haunts me & I will never "get over it" or "move on" from it. The scars are there, deep inside & they rip open to bleed from time to time. 

It doesn't matter how old you are... the damage is irreversible & life altering. I know what happened. I was there, I felt it, & believe me when I say it wasn't "a game of doctor that got OUT OF HAND", nor was it "Just boys being boys". It was RAPE & it is a life sentence that I will never be paroled from. He got off scotfree..

GentleTears GentleTears
36-40, F
7 Responses May 11, 2012

I'm sorry for your pain. Its terrible that you've had to live your life this way. I hope that you find the strength let go of the past and find peace.

I was 12 and he 14. We were in the school bleachers after a pep rally and everyone was gone. He wanted to make out, I wanted to go home. My arms were stretched across the walking rail and he punched me in my belly multiple times. My top was pushed up exposing my boobs hen he pushed my skirt up and pulled my panties down. He laid me on the bleachers with my legs spread across the bench. I tried resisting again but he punched me in my breasts four times then another four blows to my bellybutton. The final punch was to my bare pubic bone and I submitted. I raised my arms, spread my legs and told him to rape me. He to tongued and fingered my vaginally until I orgasmed then he raped me. I clearly remember his erect penis forcing its way deep into my vagina then ***********.

that is not nice what that guy did to you at so young. so sad you wanted your first time to be wonderful and not like this. you are really lucky you did not get pregnan.

What. The. F uck. No, a human body doesn't work that way. No matter what he would have gotten off scotfree (he is ten, not even old enough for juvenile detention). Most kids don't even understand the functions of sex at ten years old, and definitely not boys, as they start puberty at a much older age than girls. It seems highly implausible for a boy at an age where he could not get a proper erection to rape anybody. If this had been a rare exception to all the factors I mentioned, then I wish you the best of luck. It must have been horrible to remember something that happened when you are nine all the way till your forties. Your story is a very rare one, and many of the factors don't logically add up. I am surprised no one else on the site had noticed. Please, fellow readers, don't be too quick to offer you sympathy, try to instead see a solution or a way to help other than just a few kind words. Hopefully we can rid this site of all those not seeking consolation but instead attention garnered through immoral means.

You're kidding right? What did you say? a boy of ten can't get an erection and commit rape on a small child? would you like to use your 9 year old daughter to test that ridiculous point of view? children today are being exposed to sex at home and sexually explicit material at very young ages. I know of cases of vaginal rape and other form of sexual assault on little girls by boys as young as 6 years and maybe younger. Kids can easily mimic what they are seeing and have sexual experiences.

You go wonderer111! Even if boys can't get an erection (as some grown men) they know how to force fingers and objects inside a Girl's vagina and anus. Tied spread eagle is traumatic for a child. Also if her arms are held and boys repeatedly punch her in her belly until she can't fight is scary. crylight95 probably cries light becouse he can't get an erection.

if the boy is not just a rapist but a sadist as well he may bite her nipples and boobs really hard including her belly. yes **** can warp a boys mind as well as a girls. alot of these girls wanted to wait till there older teens and adults. make sure she consents and make to make to take time for a woman to be lubbed or wet down there. a lot men do not understand that foreplay is not a stereo type. some places did not allow foreplay during the middle ages must have been a sadist man that did this law. i wonder how many young boys got there mind warped from ****** either there older sister or older cousin. i would have rather have cuddle or snuggle with a girl i was really young.

If you tell, you will feel better. But I know from experience that scars can run deep, and may never heal. If you read my story, you will completely understand.

Thank you all for your words of wisdom & comfort. I am better than I was, but I will admit to it still having an effect on how I live & even how I feel about & see myself. When I moved away from Ontario (where I grew up), I found it easier to deal with as he is no longer within my eyesight. He lived near me all my life, at one point I honestly believed that he was stalking me. I don't know if he was or not, but it was enough to give me night terrors for years.<br />
Again, thank you all for your comfort & understanding. <br />
<br />
FYI:: I've been in "therapy" off & on since I was 16. I have come to believe that some experiences just mark us permanently & all we can do is learn to live with them. : (

Could you not tell anyone - i guess that easy to say as an adult but when you are a child you think that it your fault - and its not - you think maybe you'll get into trouble. Oh its so hard to tell children to be open and talk about these things.

u poor girl.it wasn't right.