My Mothers Boyfriend

My mothers boyfriend molested me several times as a teen. However, I never really said no, and kind of let it happen, since I had such a messed up relationship with my mother. After I graduated high school, I told my mother what her boyfriend had been doing to me. She screamed at me, and I ran out of the house, staying in the woods near my house. I started to go back to the house once the sun started to go down, and just before getting there, I saw him standing there, face red and he was livid. My mother must have confronted him. I turned and ran, but he caught up with me quickly, and knocked me to the ground. He ripped my dress and raped me, and I screamed and screamed until he put his arm around my throat to choke me. When he was done, he went to the house, and I cried out in the woods for a while. Then I went into the house, where he was screaming at my mother, telling her it was her fault. I left that night and took a bus to Washington. I haven't talked to my mother or her boyfriend since, but I heard that they broke up 2 years after I left.
cosmicspeck cosmicspeck
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 18, 2011

Brave of you to share these painful memories. It takes courage to leap into the unknown, right at a time when many women would be relying on their families in getting started in their adult lives.
Victims of sexual predators of all ages sometimes think that they are somehow responsible for what happens to them. As a child you were not in a position of knowledge, experience and power, to know what else to do to survive. You are not at all to blame for your attacker's choices.

When confronted by such an unpleasant truth (boyfriend is molesting my daughter) its a great pity your mother's self-protective reaction was to hit out at you instead of connecting and empathising (which are not humans' default reactions).

Can I suggest that this life situation has the potential to cause you ongoing grief unless it is worked through with professional help?

In a practical sense too, I believe rape doesn't generally have a statute of limitations in US states. Have you reported the rape to the police? It's your choice to do so or not to, but it may prevent some other person from being subjected to similar treatment.

Good luck, you are among friends here.

Be strong!!

I am so sorry you went through this!<br />
<br />
I'm sorry to say this but I just can't get over your Mom's actions (and lack there of)!<br />
I can't believe it took her a YEAR to get rid of him, and that she didn't report him to the police!!!<br />
<br />
I'm glad you had the courage to leave!<br />
I hope all goes well for you! <br />
You are a strong young lady!<br />
<br />

Good getting away was the best thing for you. Hope you get over this for good. Stuff like this messes with your head in ways other people don't realize! Just remember you're not alone!