He Didn't Believe Me....

No details cause it hurts to much to remember....

I was seeing this guy who was great and  i have known him since  I was 14. I would do anything for him. So I let his cousin be my roomate. One morning i woke up to his cousin over me.... needless to say what happened next... his cousin eneded up going to him before I could and said that we just had sex then after all kinds of drama he said I forced HIM.... now, I am 5'2" and a heavy, but this guys is 6"3" and big... how could I force HIM??? not possible... But the guy I was seeing for a while believed him because I didnt tell him what happened I kept denying that ANYTHING had happened  because I knew he  would flip on his cousin for what he did to me... My heart was broken and still is to this day because he didn't believe me!

dreamergirl dreamergirl
22-25, F
21 Responses Jan 23, 2007

Hiya
I totally understand I bin with the love off my life for 3 years I was raped by someone he new and he called me a lier! I'm still with him but it kills me everyday sometimes more then the rape I written a story pleaseread your advice would be APRECIATED as I can't carry on like this I'm starting to hate and resent my partner and the last thing I won't is to hate him I don't no weather to just call it away bycause no mater how hard I try I can't forget what he said to me and it's slowly destroying me.
I'm very sorry for your pain you are not alone I'm there with you step by step same thoughts and feelings write to me anytime hope to HETE your advice on my story x

Hay chick I understand my situation is the same difference is I'm still with my partner and everyday it kills me him not believeing me I don't no what to do he's the love of my life and I can't be without him but I can't move on with my life beccause everytime I look at him I see the betrayal that he did to me I don't no what to do can u help ?

Ur fault for being stupid. Shouldve told him u got raped

My partner new I was raped

I know excaly how u feel. I didn't tell my brother his friend did it to me because I knew if would literally kill him. And my partner broke up with me because I said I was lying and my story didn't add up! Theses on worse a feeling than trying to prove it happened. We are not alone

It seems, at times, the rape is secondary pain because of the pain we go through afterwards. I'm sorry you were not believed; it seems this secret we feel we need to keep, causes us more pain than the rape did! Try to get through letting the secrets out, its the only true way to heal!
Much empathy,
Pam

I am going through the same thing right now. Happened a month ago. I ended up leaving him because I couldn't take knowing what happened to me and him not believeing it. I was there for him so many times and when I needed him the most he deserted me. I got help and it helped a lot but I still can't stop thinking of the betrayal. It hurts but know if you want to make things better you have to do the things you know are right. Even if it hurts it will benefit you in the long run.

I\'m still with my partner like u he didn\'t believe me I berred it for ages my feelings but I can\'t anymore the betrayal I feel is the ultimate I\'d rather him cheat on me I bet I wudnt feel this much pain please help guys I don\'t no what to do I\'m stuck I don\'t won\'t to leave him but I just can\'t move on I need to try move on with my life but cuz
y man now\'s the guy they was friends I feel I\'ll never have closure on what happened to me I won\'t to dis associAte with every1 who now\'s my rapiezt and Ihave except my partner everytime I look at him I see that day he said what he did to me he dnot understand what he has done to me any advice is APRECIATED x

This guy probably believed his cousin because he is a blood relative and you r just a girlfriend. It can be like that sometimes. Add the fact you denied anything happened and I understand him taking sides. If you had told him what really happened and he still didn't believe you then you could feel like he betrayed you. I hope you find peace with this matter. xx

That's so sad but when I was raped someone I thought was my "friend" didn't even believe me :-(

I belive this is where you cut all ties with that whole family. you need to take to someone who is a pro(rape councier, Dr. family, friends, neighbor, church person, Etc) try to be thankful that your not married to the ***. It sounds like this wouldn't be the first time for these two scumbags. run and never look back!

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I sorry that happen to you because guys always take up for each other and that was just wroong for what he did when he listen to the other guy I would of had tthat mess all over tv and had his butt lock up for that.

Hi mm I don,t know what to say about rape,well I do it is horrific and should never happen.No means no.I have an 8 yr old son and I have educated him so far about respecting girls/woman though at that age he is not interested in girls yet.I don't know why your old boyfriend believed his cousin over you..If you see him again I would tell him and tell him how pissed off you were that this happened and you were not believed ..

The guy sounds like a real winner.Pathetic piece of crap he is.Call a rape center and talk with someone.You will probably or have gone through all the stages of grief.But the healing will take time.I have a very real dislike almost hatred for rapists.And I cannot someone would belive a story about him being forced.You did survive and you are talking about it and thats good.Here Ill make a silly face and make a funny smile.Hope that makes you laugh!

My wife told me the truth 28 years later and i believed her. An acquiantance of both of us tried to rape her in the church all three of us went. Thank God nothing happend. But she was ashamed. And thought i wouldn't believe her if she told me or that i would think of her as dirty if i did believe her. SHe was also afraid that the attacker would try to say they had consensual sex in which case i would have done the same as your boyfriend did. So she promised him she would not say anything. <br />
SOmething just bothered me all these years and i didn't know what it was. I would mention it to it her from time to time but she would just get aggravated. at this point she was sure she would take the secret to her grave. after prying she broke down really broke down and told me the truth about what happened. She believed i would be leaving anytime after that. SHe held on to the secret for 28 years thinking i would leave her in an instant the minute i found out someone force himself on her. She even asked me if i hated her now that i knew. I hugged her so tight and kissed her and said i loved her so much. She still made me promised i would not leave her. She felt very insecure. She make me promise not to tell any one. ANd here is where i failed her. I confessed, but i hope it brings you some healing.

boys r stupid!!!<br />
if you have a brain you would see the truth.<br />
your ok sweety, if its over and you want to leave it, then do that. you can't change the past but you can change next week, next mouth, next year.<br />
its good you can talk about it be proud of that!!!

tell the boyfriend the truth... it will make it much better...

im sorry for what happend to u .. i know how it feels to have something happen and the person not believe u but believe the lier

OK, so this pathetich HUGE guy is essentially saying YOU raped HIM, that is the most pathetic thing i have heard so far, holy crap!! From one rape victim to another, please get some help, if you haven't, EVEN WITH help it's still difficult to deal with but without it i can't imagine how one continues on with their life. i know some people can but i couldn't. i know every rape victim/survivor goes through hell afterwards, torturing themselves with *what could i have done differently?* just remember the only thing you had to do was find a way to SURVIVE it and you did!!

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Get professional help! Call a rape center and do what they say!